Texas Governor Seen as 'Turkey in the Straw' of Florida Poll
Saturday, September 24, 2011
Secaucus Fats had been giving serious thought to entering
the presidential race as a William Howard Taft Republican.
That was before he learned that Taft was actually a Comm-
unist, whose domestic agenda emphasized trust-busting,
civil service reform, strengthening the Interstate Com-
merce Commission, improving the performance of the
postal service, and passing the Sixteenth Amend-
ment to the Constitution, which authorized the
income tax.
Friday, September 23, 2011
Thursday, September 22, 2011
These are some of the interchangeable parts other people
(not shown) use to rule the world. For example, James
Amos, a four-star Marine general, is seen here protecting
his private parts from a sneak attack by those (not shown)
who might, at any moment, decide that he is expendable.
[This, of course, is just another conspiracy theory.]
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Representative John Fleming (R-LA) needs your help. Even
with his medical practice, his congressional salary of $174,000,
and the $6.3 million his Subway and UPS franchises pulled
in last year, he's barely scraping by. So, if you would, please
pay a bit more in taxes so that this Great Physician won't
have to.
Monday, September 19, 2011
"I hate to be the one to tell you this, Governor Perry, but
your face has deeper cracks in it than the one a month-old
puppy fell into in Garland, Texas."
Some people believe that Reality is objective and obeys
the laws of logic and the scientific method for formulating
theories, testing hypotheses, and verifying facts. Based
on this belief, some people proudly proclaim themselves
to be members of the Reality-Based Community. The
problem with this belief is that it's only one of many
versions of Reality. Truth is, radically divergent
Reality-Based Communities are constantly competing
for supremacy, and what, at any given moment, is called
the World is the version of Reality currently prevailing.
"I have more power than anybody other than God. I can get
things changed quickly. I don't have to go through the legis-
lative process; I don't have to do any of that. I can just bring
it to the people, and say, look, this has gotta be dealt with.
And if the people don't agree, I just have them exterm-
inated. And, by the way, the name is Stalin, not O'Reilly!"