Bildungblog
Saturday, June 16, 2012
World's Worst Yobs #253
Neil Munro
Team Wendy's Disconsolate After Baconator Debacle
in Kiev
We Come in Peace for All Mankind
Whirlybird Hunting Season Now Open in Brazil
Friday, June 15, 2012
The stock price of Cynicism reached a new high today when
the Discovery Channel revealed that Captain Kangaroo
was never actually a captain, that he had padded his resume
and
had never risen above the rank of corporal.
Colonel Sanders Sez: "Although I'm often
confused
with Fearguth, don't be fooled:
he neither owns a
string tie nor does he
know my secret recipe
of eleven herbs
and spices."
Little Known Fact #30
When she's Wonder Woman, Sarah Palin
can
run so fast she can dodge all the
raindrops
in a thunderstorm and never
get wet. When she's not, she's just
another grifter.
The Politico
Illustrated #26
"Welcome to
Inside David Koch
, brought to you by
The Politico
's resident colonoscopists,
Kenneth
P. Vogel and Tarini Parti. Oh, the mouse? Just
a local resident. Calls itself Danger Mouse."
"Sorry, no helicopter rides for climate change deniers."
Husband of Seven Wives Says
Five Wives Vodka
"Only
80 Proof,
Not Nearly Strong Enough to Get Me Through
a Whole Week's Worth of Wives"
"Country First? Ha! John McCain
First? Get real! It's always been
Ed Harris First!"
"I'm Hispanic, you're Hispanic, we're all Hispanic!"
Local Band 'Really Enjoying' 5th Annual
Budget Buster
Summer Tour
"Tell them, Poppy, that you don't like Ross
Perot and that Juan Williams doesn't like
Michelle Malkin."
"Whoopee! Now I can buy some new teeth!"
The Unexpurgated Bible #76
And as they were conferring, the President took bread,
and blessed it, and brake it, and gave it to the lawmakers,
and said, "Take,
eat; this is from Subway."
"Remember, ladies: here in Michigan, we only say
'Naughty Bits'."
Thursday, June 14, 2012
Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #393
Mike Callton
"Hmmm, Mitt Romney must be speaking today in our
nation's shrine to journalism."
Cougars Again Prowl Midwest
In a radio interview Thursday, Governor Rick
Scott said he was forced to cast a provisional ballot
in 2006 because election officials thought he was
undead.
Sheldon Adelson to Bid $100,000,000
During 2012 Presidential Auction
"It'll take time, Mr. President, but you'll
find that being Assassin-in-Chief is more
fun than playing
Wolfenstein 3D
."
After the
Citizens United
decision, the word 'election'
fell out of favor and was replaced by 'private auction'.
"Yes, this is the last week to save up to 50% on
great
deals for Dads and Grads. Better buy now before I
change my mind."
Ghastly Monsters and Blond Giants #148
Amy Kremer and Tom Whitmore
Wednesday, June 13, 2012
Not a Very Nice Right-Wing Twit
Why do we always seem to be living in either Pre-War
America,
War America, or Post-War America?
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
Alabama Republican Flees Solar System to Pursue Milky Way
Galaxy Sperm Donation ‘Obsession’
Mitt Romney Submits 'RMoney', Wins
Anagram
Contest Hands Down
It's always difficult to tell when Representative Louie
Gohmert
(R-TX) is having a seizure and when he isn't.
"These 'National Security Leaks' have got to stop!
There's only so much truth America can handle
before
it
emerges from its cocoon and morphs into
another changeless and hopeless Europe."
"Did you hear that talking to yourself makes you smarter?"
"Yes, that's obviously why I'm smarter than you are."
Latest Jeb Bush Drone Attack on Right-Wing
Republican Strongholds Wipes Out Dozens,
Maybe
Scores, Perhaps Even Hundreds
Those who know George Zimmerman best say that Shellie,
his wife, is even meaner than he is.
Jim Cramer is apparently one of those middle-aged men who
believes hair at the bottom of the head distracts attention
from its absence on the top.
Sorry, Jim,
but it
only makes
your nob look even nuder and reminds us of
the old
adage, "Hair today, gone tomorrow."
"Are you experienced, sir? Not necessarily stoned, but
beautiful."
Morte Gras
"What did you say they call this climbing wall?"
"Dick Cheney."
If you hope to be zombie-proof, you must follow the example
of Senator John Cornyn (R-TX) and be brains-free.
Have you ever wondered why Jesus didn't
come to Earth as a billionaire, like Dr. Evil?
Of Chris Christie, it hath been said, "He doesn't let
grass grow under his feet: it's too shady there."
Uncle Sam's Uncle
Local Villain Faces Felony Charge
After
Causing Four-Car Crash
"Tell me again: are we about to go over a 'fiscal cliff' or
a 'physical cliff'?"
If Mitt Romney were a spy, he would be a Triple Agent:
for his side, for our side, and for their side. And he
would be disloyal to all three.
If Pigs Could Fly
If Pigs Could Talk
It's easy to spot a 21st-Century Whig.
John Sununu Sez: "Who needs more teachers? Look
what they did to me!"
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