Monday, February 12, 2007

Vlad the Impaler Shortly After Attacking
His Soulmate, George the Decider
"And I’ve got to say, even if Libby's convicted — and he may
not be — but even if he is convicted, would any judge send to
prison a guy named Scooter? He wouldn’t last 48 hours. I
know, because I'm a former Harvard University Institute of
Politics fellow named Roger and I wouldn't last 24."
"I mean, there’s no underlying crime here that anyone has
been indicted for. This is just a show trial, just like in the
days of Stalin. By the way, did you know that the Russian
dictator's real name was Joseph Vissarionovich Djugashvili,
and that my real name is Roger Sumbitch Crockashit?"
All the rocket-propelled grenades manufactured in Iran are
labeled in English. This is done to deceive the U. S. military
into thinking they were made in a Northern Marianas Island
sweatshop and licensed by Tommy Hilfiger for resale under
a no-bid contract awarded to Halliburton by the
Bush Administration.
"How was I to know that Microsoft PowerPoint would
turn out to be the Pentagon's most effective weapon
in the war against truth, justice, and the American Way?"
U. S. Military Claims Iran Is Supplying Mortar Rounds
to Iraqi Militants with Expired 'Enjoy By' Dates
Military Analyst Showing How He Discovered That the
'Highest Levels' of the Iranian Government Are Responsible
for Attacks Against U.S. Troops in Iraq
Khaled and Mahmoud were awed at the sight of the oldest,
biggest, and most sacred wingnut in the world.
Christina Aguilera Doing Her Impression 
of Madonna Doing Her Impression of Jayne
 Mansfield Doing Her Impression of Marilyn
 Monroe Doing Her Impression of
Jean Harlow
World's Worst Jobs #27
Chinese Waste Recycler

Dirty Old Man Reveals Dirty Little Secret

"Once again, we have a prosecutor who can’t get an
 indictment for the real crime — leaking the identity 
of a CIA agent. So he goes instead for the crime of, 
well, people didn’t tell him the complete truth when
 they talked to him." Thus is suggested a new defin-
ition of a 'lie': it's an 'incomplete truth'.
When you look at this closeup of Michelle Malkin's teeth, you
understand why the blogosphere isn't quite ready for hi-def.
Commenting on the Libby trial, Roger Simon says,
"I also have to say this is a nutty trial that
nobody except the people involved in it and the
people covering it care about. And, no, I'm not
the Simon who met a pieman going to the fair."

Sunday, February 11, 2007

President Bush has sworn on a copy of the Budget of the
U. S. Government for Fiscal Year 2008 that the federal
budget will be balanced by 2012, four years after he leaves
office and the year Ralph Nader, having exacerbated
the contradictions sufficiently, is tapped to be the CEO
of General Motors.
The Pope always gets pumped when the announcer says,
"Heeeeeres Benny!"
David Beckham Demonstrating How 
He Keeps Posh Spice Happy
What Was Left of Big Bird After President Bush
Slashed the Budget for Public Television
"And not only is he wrong about the war in Iraq, Prime Minister Howard,
but did you know Obama bin Laden isn't either white enough or
black enough to be elected President of the United States?"
"Look right here, Mr. President. This staff directory proves
I used to work for you. See, it says: A-N-D-R-E-W C-A-R-D.
That's me!"
Can you find what doesn't belong in this picture?

"So, you're Michael Gordon, the New York Times reporter who
put all the Bush Administration malarkey about Iraqi WMDs on
the front page of the newspaper of record. And now you're doing
the same thing regarding Iran. Have you no shame, sir, have you
no shame?"
Michael Gordon Named the Judith Miller Reciter of Bush
Administration Warmongering for the New York Times