World's Worst Yobs #299

Joshua Encinias

Dweebs, Dorks, and Doofuses #46

Robert Litt

'I Was Putin's Pawn'

by 

Elizabeth Wahl

'I Was Putin Spawn'

by

Yekaterina Putina

Before he died, Fred Phelps learned that Slayer would 

be leading a protest at his funeral.  This is a picture of 

his reaction at that moment in time, when Fred screamed,  

"No, no, no, not Slayer! Anybody but Slayer!"

Why is Madonna trying to prove that at 55, she

 has finally reached puberty?

Crackpot Realist Current Frontrunner for the 

2016 Idiocratic Party Presidential Nomination

Idaho Killing 4,000 Angry Birds to Save 

One Endangered Turd Burd

Imperial Wizard Frank Ancona Sez: “We don’t hate people 

because of their race. I mean, we’re a Christian organization.”

[With friends like Frank, Christianity doesn't

need enemies.]

Patrick Howley, He of the Prognathous 

Mouthparts, Doing His Smoking

Jay Leno Impression

"As octopuses go, I'll admit I'm rather small.  Nevertheless,

 I have three hearts and you only have one.  So there!"

Dali's Fork

Oxymorons for Our Time #161

Republican Outreach

Just Deserts #3

Fred Phelps will spend eternity carrying a protest 

sign with 'God Loves Fags' on it.

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #555

David VanDerBeek

And then Jesus said unto him, "I never knew you,

 Fred Phelps: depart from me, you that work iniquity!"

Patrick Howley Sez:  "In our sexless and mediocre modern 

era, a Natural American Spirit cigarette is a banal letdown 

from the very first drag."

World's Worst Yoobs #142

Ashe Schow

Patrick Howley still exists, just not on

Twitter anymore.

He tried to find love in an elevator, but failed.

Factoid of the Hour #20

It's National Peanut Month!

Oviraptosaur (Anzu wyliei) Sez:  

"Old MacDonald had a farm E-I-E-I-O!

And on that farm he had some chicks, E-I-E-I-O!

With a chick-chick here, and a chick-chick there

Here a chick there a chick, everywhere a chick-chick!

Old MacDonald had a farm E-I-E-I-O!"

Ghastly Monsters and Blond Giants #169

Mike Chamberlain and Jim Geraghty

Asked how he managed to steal $460,000 in

 quarters over a two-year period, New Jersey 

official Thomas Rica said he stuffed them

 into the big pockets of his coat, a replica of 

Captain Kangaroo's.

"So much for your plan to camp at Valley Forge, General

Washington.  It has been flooded with five million gallons

of raw sewage."

The Mad Ghoul (1943)

The Mad Ghoul (2014)

Major Pipeline Leaks More than 7,000 Gallons of Fresh 

Water into Ohio Crude Oil Preserve

Angus T. Jones Sez:  "The only thing worse than a paid

hypocrite like I was before I grew my awesome beard

 is an unpaid hypocrite."

Warm Scuzzies #453

John Swallow

It's the Ron Cobb Show!

Would everyone please stop envying Ken Langone, the

co-founder of Home Depot?  It makes him feel like he's

living in Nazi Germany in 1933.

"Hey, Teddyboy, take off that coat and show us

your tats!"

First the major retailers stopped selling smokes.  Then

came the Ciggy Police.

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #554

Troy Mader

'Scientists Revive 1,500-Year-Old Life Form'

Big Bigots, Little Bigots #33

Phil Jensen

"Would you like to play 'I've Got a Secret'?"

DemoKitty had been patiently lying in wait to pounce on 

Prince Rebus.  The time to act had finally come!

A Holiday Wish All the Way from Bikini Bottom

"Whatcha watchin', honey?"

"Rogue TV, Sarah Palin's new digital

video channel."

"Sounds boring."

"Oh, it is, it is!"

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #553

Adam Baldwin

Fred Phelps on the Edge of Death

"After reading the transcript of yesterday morning’s 

interview, it is clear that I was inarticulate about the 

point about '#mcconnelling' I was trying to make."

Octogenarian Couple Kicked Out of McDonald’s for Sitting 

‘Too Long’ Punished with Offer of Free Meals for Life