Saturday, May 10, 2008

Another Explanation for Why You Always
Find Only One Shoe Beside the Road
"Hey, I was just jerking your chain!
I can't handle the truth, either!"
Famous Blogger Appalled by the Number of Obama
Supporters Who Don't Shop at Target
Walnuts and Peanuts
“John just said, 'Don’t give me that shit! And take your
hands off me!' He's such a kidder."
Rear Admiral John Stufflebeem has been forced into retirement
for having sex in the White House. Will President Bush be next?

Friday, May 09, 2008

"I look into the eyes of each and every one of you and say:
I have never taken bribes. I never took a dime into my
own pocket.  You are getting very sleepy."
"I'm so happy you guys like to play Charades as much as I do."
"In the words of Richard Nixon, that great American statesman,
'I am not a crook!'"
"My husband is absolutely opposed to any negative
campaigning at all. That's why John is disappointed
Obama bin Laden was offended when Hamas
endorsed him."
Hillary Dog-Whistling to the Voters of Kentucky and West Virginia
Vito Finito
American Empire #22
Asymmetric Warfare
Hillary says she has a "much broader base to build a
winning coalition on." Now that you think of it, she is
rather broad-beamed, wouldn't you say?
"John McCain seems to have lost his bearings.
Has anybody seen them?"
One of the ways a dictionary defines a word is to use it
in a sentence. For example, look up 'insufferable' and you
might see, "Chris Matthews is an insufferable blowhard."

Thursday, May 08, 2008

Razing McCain #5
If John McCain were a lizard, he would be an Albino Chameleon.
"Hang on a sec! My cellphone is ringing."
As yet another sign of progress since the fall of the Soviet Union,
Krasnoyarsk, Russia, now has traffic jams even when the temperature
is 22 degrees below zero.
"Funny, you'd think this painting would be a lot
heavier than it is."
Steely Dann
Razing McCain #4
Senator McVain
Great Misadventures in Science #3
John McCain Undergoes Rhinoplasty
Thrill of Victory

Agony of Defeat

Wednesday, May 07, 2008

"Burn her, I say, she turned me into a newt!"
Hillary's M.O. Revealed for Winning the Hearts of White Voters
EPA Chief Stephen Johnson skipped a Senate
hearing today, claiming he has "back problems."
It seems somebody has stolen his spine.
Michelle Malkin, Jesse's Bitter Half
Bronze Man Challenges Iron Man to Heavy Metal Death Match
Clinton Supporter's Adamantine Resolve Begins to Soften
World's Worst Jobs #79
Indian Oil Refinery Gas Flares
Upon learning that his kind was treated with more respect there
than human beings, the iguana decided to immigrate to Gitmo.
Hillary Loses Nomination Battle, Wins Rocket Man
Consolation Prize

Tuesday, May 06, 2008

Razing McCain #3
Presidential Candidate Diagnosed with Two Incurable Maladies:
Stone in the Heart and Ossification of the Head
World's Worst Yobs #33
Max Boot
Scott Bloch, Chief of DOJ's Office of Special
Counsel, Target of FBI Investigation for Disk
Laundering and Towel Day Extravagancy
Madonna and Child
Blackwater President Gary Jackson Excited About
New 'Private Mercenary Army' Ringtone

Monday, May 05, 2008

On the outside: Michael Gordon, a New York Times reporter.
On the inside: an anonymous Bush Administration official.
Even though his office is "rife with booze, profanity,
inappropriate sexual activity, misuse of state vehicles,
and on-the-job threats involving the Mafia," Ohio
Attorney General Marc Dann says, "I am in the office,
have rolled up my sleeves, and am working on behalf
of the people of State of Ohio." Sounds like he's the
typical workaholic.
Careful! If you stare at President Bush when he doesn't
want you to, he'll call you a 'lookist'.
Razing McCain #2
Orthodox: 'Ortho'=Straight, 'Dox'=Talk

World's Worst Jobs #78
Afghan Flour Market Worker

Before the Wright Brothers, there were the Wrong Brothers.
Thrilla in Manila 2: The Revenge of Allah
With a price tag of over $600 million, the U. S. Embassy
in Baghdad has given new meaning to 'Green Zone'.
In Afghanistan, the Gerber slogan is: "Anything for baby,
so long as it's rice."

Sunday, May 04, 2008

Tragic Mask
Comic Mask

Tragicomic Mask