Saturday, July 29, 2017

Trump Doodle, 'Flipping the Bird Skyline', Sells
at Auction for $29,184
"Is it true, Mr. Priebus, that Trump once called you into 
the Oval Office just to zip up his fly?"
"I have the love of Jesus, love of Jesus,
Down in my heart, (where?)
Down in my heart, (where?)
Down in my heart."

Friday, July 28, 2017

Trump Sez: "Tom Homan looks very nasty. He looks very 
mean. I said, that's what I'm looking for."
Syrian Paradise for Couples
Luxury Included Vacations
"Hey, Reince, duck yer head!
Hmm, you're a little bit late on that one, Reince
Ooh, I bet that smarts!"
"I agreed to be Trump's chief of staff on the condition
that I can wear my cammies on Casual Fridays."
Sean Hannity denies he spent $42,000 to eat this 70-year-old
lobster at Trump International Hotel. He claims it's his pet.
Don't Mess with the Mooch!

Thursday, July 27, 2017

The Mooch Sez: “I’m not Steve Bannon. I’m 
not trying to blow my own Contrabass Flute.”
From The Apprentice to The Beleaguerer
Descent into the Maelstrom
World's Worst Yobs #387
John Daniel Davidson
See the Madness!  Feel the Madness!  Be the Madness!
Scaramaniacs Overnight Sensation 
on Cartoon Network
Karl Marx would be proud.
Damn! Gonna Need a Bigger Skillet!
Trump's Bulldog Takes a Little Time Off
Upon hearing she wouldn't be able to serve in Trump's 
military, Trumpnik Caitlyn Jenner had a sad.
The Mooch Consigns Another Tweet to the Twitter Hereafter
"When I obey Trump's command to nuke China, I will be
reaffirming the principle of the civilian control of the 
military."

Wednesday, July 26, 2017

Tillerson Staying on as Secretary of ExxonMobil
Just moments before someone snatched a knot in
Buddy Carter's ass.
What we now have with Trump and Sessions is a 
Mexican Standoff, but without any Mexicans.
“With the exception of the late, great Hard Drinkin' Lincoln, 
I can be more presidential than any president that’s ever held 
this office. It's real easy."
Don't you just love it when John McCain makes an impassioned 
appeal for bipartisanship and then votes the straight GOP
 party line?
Having been pranked by the Jerky Boys of Russia,
Rick Perry went beyond nail biting to knuckle
gnawing.
"Hmm, biofuel made from pigshit and Jack
 Daniel's? I'll have to tell the boss about this 
when he's through talking trash to the Boy 
Scouts!"

Tuesday, July 25, 2017

"Holy shit, honey, you won't believe what I just found in
our likker cabinet!"
"I said, who the hell wants to speak about politics when 
I'm in front of the Boy Scouts?"
Maybe John Calvin was onto something.
At Dawn We Slept
Susan Collins Sez: "I don't mean to be unkind, but 
Farenthold's so unattractive it's unbelievable."
As the World Turns
Trump Kicking Baobab Tree's Ass
"I want to aid and abet Trump's agenda."
"What can I say? The Trumpjugend love me!"
"Half a Mooch is better than no Mooch at all."
Ark Encounter Collides with Financial Iceberg, 
Climate Change Claims Another Victim
Trump Is Toast and the Toaster That Makes It

Monday, July 24, 2017

Big Game Zucchini Hunter and His 
Trusty Sidekick, Cleopatra
Can you imagine this pig's ass from Texas settling
anything 'Aaron Burr-style'?
Too late, Trump realized it wasn't cool
to wrap yourself in the Russian flag.
Two Thumbs Up! Trump and Nixon Doing Their 
Siskel & Ebert Impression
"Thirteenth floor---Collusions, Conspiracies, Connivances."
Jared Kushner Sez: "I couldn't have colluded with the
Russians because I'm way too incompetent to have done
that."

Sunday, July 23, 2017

"It's very sad that Republicans, even some that were
 carried over the line on my back, do very little to
 protect their President."
"Limbo lower now
Limbo lower now
How low can you go?"
Now we know: it was that Wascal Wabbit who stole
the office fwidge.
They're Back!