"Thanks to Governor Brownback, I can sleep soundly

 tonight, knowing that Kansas is safe from Sharia law."

Benedictine Plumbers Identify Paolo the Butler 

as Cause of Vatileaks

Levi Johnston, Notorious Sperm Gifter, Goes Back Home 

to His Mommy

For the world-famous Blubberlugger Brothers, it was 

just another day at Pebble Beach. 

Rush Cam Installed to Enable Round-the-Clock Online

 Viewing of Limbaugh Bust in Missouri State Capitol

Winner of Geography Bee Even Knew Capital of

Uz-beki-beki-beki-stan-stan

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #390

Deborah Pauly

Thomas Kinkade named this painting, 'The 

Good Life'.  He should have named it,

'Whiskey River, Don't Run Dry'.

"Who's the guy selling Jesus-on-a-Stick?"

Coming Soon to a Theatre Near You #66

Flesh Eaters from Georgia

"I'm a Facebook backer.  Wanna buy my shorts?"

"Would the man in the orange tie please call the 

Projectile Verping Hotline at 1-800-455-7853?

This is an emergency!"

Alan Simpson:  a Gasbag as Big as

the State of Wyoming

"Not positive, but I think this baby is trying to say,

 'Don't Bain me, bro, don't Bain me!'"

Who really gives a flying fig what General

Colin Powell thinks about same-sex marriage?

"Mr. Sullivan, were you as shady looking before you

became Director of the Secret Service?"

"Jon Stewart told me he was a socialist and then he 

waggled my cheeks."

Ross Douthat and His Metaphysically-Coherent Hairdo

Titanic Joke

If, as a recent study claims, you are more likely to drink 

and smoke pot if you listen to loud music, would you more 

likely go to clown funerals if you listen to soft music?

World's Shortest Man Sez:  "Today's books are too long."

The Grin Reaper Is a Big Bully

Sane Daniel Webster

Insane Daniel Webster

Vial of Ronald Reagan's Blood and a Fragment 

of Christ's True Cross Up for Bid in UK Auction

The Grime Reaper

George Tierney, the Most Famous Moran of

Greenville, South Carolina

Cory Booker, Mayor of Newark, and a Wholly-Owned 

Subsidiary of Bain Capital

Code Pink Grasshopper Sez:  "I seek not to know the 

answers, but to understand the questions." 

Only 8, her idol was James Bond, a heavy smoker, 

and her best friend was a lead-crystal ash tray.

The side effects of drinking Gatorade G2 are

 just now beginning to be better understood.

Conspiracy theories come and go, but the oldest, 

according to paleontologists, is the Great Quetzalcoatlus 

Scavenger Hunt Theory, first propounded 65 million 

years ago by a species of relatively small saurids who are, 

unfortunately, unattested by any known fossil record.

Rightbloggers and Other 

Internet Biohazards #124

The Pray in Jesus Name Project

"The Governor Jan Brewer Apple Peeler with Suction Base

is only $19.95.  Be among the first 100 callers and we will

double your order.  All you pay is extra shipping and 

handling.  Call now!"

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #389

Charles Worley

Whose SuperPAC was bigger, Romney's or Obama's?  

Until they dropped trou, Stephen Colbert couldn't tell.

"Yeah, I understand that all the NATO geniuses have gotten 

together in Chicago and decided to change the name of this 

country from 'Afghanistan' to 'Shitholeistan' and then 

get the hell out."

Apparently, there are a lot of people in Chicago who 

really hate Jimmy John's Gourmet Sandwiches.

Israeli Doughboys

Take heed, American homophobes:  anti-gay bigots in

the Ukraine don't pussyfoot around.

"'Gobshite'?  I don't believe I'm 

familiar with that term."

Rush Limbaugh Rivals Pink Flamingo as 

Florida's Most Popular Lawn Ornament

When the Romneybot 2.0 began to stare vacantly into space, 

its designers knew it was time to take it offline for some

 unscheduled maintenance.

What Better Way to Remember

Dear Old Dad on Father's Day

When he's fully inflated, Chris Christie's

 internal psi is about the same as a 

refrigerated can of 7UP®, or 30 pounds 

per square inch.

"So, you say you don't own a Kindle or an iPad, and you

 don't use Twitter?  How did you get so out of sync with

modern times?"

When Newt Gingrich's Campaign Debt Clock reached

$4.8 million, it began to strike 13.

Transgender Miss Universe Canada Proves More 

Than Beauty Is Skin Deep

Here we see one frog in a wheelbarrow.  Imagine 218

frogs in a wheelbarrow and you would have what John

Boehner describes as the House GOP caucus.  In his

words, "It’s hard to keep 218 frogs in a wheelbarrow 

long enough to get a bill passed.”

Abdel Basset al-Megrahi Dies Almost Three Years After

He Should Have