Zebra Finch: a Bird of a Different Feather

"It's like this. If we kill them in the name of our religion

or political ideology, we're 'Freedom Fighters'. But if they

kill us in the name of their religion or political ideology,

they're 'Terrorists'. Got that?"

"Omigod, I'm so full of shit I'm turning brown!"

Who is she trying to fool? Liz is not

standing, is she?

"All I did was misinform the American people

about Iraq's WMD and Saddam Hussein's links

to Al-Qaida. By contrast, Dave Weigel dissed

Matt Drudge in private email. Can you imagine

how hurt Matt's feelings were when those

emails came to light?"

About 4,000 people are expected to attend Sarah

Palin's speech Saturday night at the Oil Palace in

Tyler. Representative Louie Gohmert is scheduled

to lead the audience in singing the theme song from

the Beverly Hillbillies, and Governor Rick Perry will

recite his ode to petroleum jelly, 'Josephine, Don't

Forget the Vaseline!'.

"Tell me what you want me to say, and I'll say it.

I'll say whatever it takes!"

"You must have misheard what I said. I didn't say

I am opposed to gay marriage because of the 'Ick

Factor'. I said 'Hick Factor'."

Two-Minute Haters #10

Lou Ann Zelenik

Coming Soon to a Theatre Near You #34

The Unbearable Whiteness of Being

Warm Scuzzies #88

The Sarah Palin Legal Defense Fund

Oxymorons for Our Time #43

Thomas Sowell's Prodigious Intellect

Rightbloggers and Other

Internet Biohazards #55

The Castillo Chronicles

"Wassup, Glenn! Carlos and I would like to invite

you over for some World Cup soccer action and

an ice-cold Bud."

Ghastly Monsters and Blond Giants #55

Ann Coulter and Alyssa Cordova

Bad Spellers of the World, UNTIE! #115

"Say 'Tweet!' one more time and I will serve

you up as a Whack-a-Mole Salad!"

If we didn't know better, we might think this is

Oust™ killing odor-causing bacteria in the air.

And then there was BP, the King Midas who

turned everything he touched into black gold.

Oxymorons for Our Time #42

Brain Management

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #179

Joan Swirsky

Corn Earworm Sez: "Unlike Missouri farmer David

Jungerman, who has received over $1 million in

government subsidies, I am NOT a parasite."

Robbing Peter to Pay Paul

"Heheheheheheee Wipe Oooout!"

"See, I told you getting a haircut lowers your ears.

And you didn't believe me, did you?"

World's Worst Yoobs #74

Katherine Mangu-Ward

"I do not use Brilliantine on my hair.

I use WD-40."

What Worrying Over the Federal Budget Day

After Day Does to Your Face

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #178

Randy Brogdon

There's something about Greta Van Susteren that

makes you want to grit your teeth.

House GOP Retains Barton as Energy

Panel's Rankest Member

McChrystal Relieved of Command, Will Begin Second

Career Playing Gunnery Sergeant Hartman in the

Remake of Full Metal Jacket

Congressman Barton's Lips Reportedly Sealed

with Krazy Glue by GOP Colleagues

"With all due respect, General McChrystal,

please just fut the shuck up!"

Would that be 10W-30 or 10W-40?

As shown here, Joe Barton's seat on the Energy

Committee is both safe and sanitary.

"The B-I-B-L-E,

Yes, that's the Book for me;

I stand upon the Word of God

The B-I-B-L-E!"

Warm Scuzzies #87

Martin Feldman

Petroleum Industry Hat Worn by Louisiana Judge

Who Overturned Drilling Bans

Wow! Is this what's called being

enthusiastic about voting?

"I hate Julius Wellhausen's Documentary Hypothesis!

I hate it, I hate it, I hate it!"

Mothra Joins Widespread Panic for the Band's

Latest Musical Triumph

World's Worst Yobs #170

Jackson Diehl

Lady Gaga to Start New Restaurant

Chain Called 'Shooters'

President Says, "Everything Has to Be on the Table;"

Bipartisan Debt Commission Says, "Yum, Yum!"

Were you to peer inside General McChrystal's skull,

all you would see is sand, sand, and more sand.

Oddly enough, the crazy man in this picture is Rep.

Phil Gingrey (R-GA), not the man in the yellow

suit and funny hat.

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #177

David Jungerman

It's probably not a good idea to wear your

'Barack Obama Is My Homeboy' t-shirt

when you go in to see Dr. Fleming for

your annual physical.

Ghastly Monsters and Blond Giants #54

Reihan Salam and Ross Douthat