Rand Paul Explaining Why He Doesn't Think Barack

 Obama's 'Views on Marriage Could Get Any Gayer"

Michele Bachmann Requests Withdrawal of Dual Swiss

 Citizenship, Citing Her Life-Long Fear of Caramel Apples 

Henry Kissinger Speaks Out Against Proposed 

English-Accent-Only Law

Over the past year, JP Morgan Chase spent $2 million 

lobbying for the loophole that allowed it to lose $2 billion. 

Among banksters, this is called Return on Investment. 

When he heard one of his advisers describe him as 'deeply

compassionate' and 'unfailingly kind', Mitt Romney

 responded in the only way he knew how.

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #386

Jane Skrovota

World's Worst Yobs #251

Timothy Carney

Young Oedipus and His Mom

Q:  What's the difference between Jamie Dimon,

Chairman of JP Morgan Chase, and a bookie?

A:  Jamie Dimon wears nicer suits.

Unlike Sasha and Malia Obama, Tripp Easton 

Mitchell Johnston, Bristol Palin's son, didn't watch

 Glee.  He just wanted to know where his daddy was.

Paul 'Come Get Some' Babeu Drops Out of House Race

No, this is not the Governor of Oklahoma.

This is.

When, on The View, Howard Stern asked Whoopi Goldberg 

about her love life, that was the cue Jesus had been awaiting 

for two thousand years to begin the Parousia. 

"I am only a baseball mascot, but even I am smart enough

to know that the presidential race from here until November

is just an excuse for selling millions and millions of dollars

 worth of political advertisements on TV."

"You must know that I'm about to die.  Why else would you

 be sticking all these mics in my face?"

Some people listen to what former Lieutenant-General

Jerry Boykin says.  It's their cue to put him back into

his straitjacket.

Where the Republican Base Lives

The Latest Stage in Zippy's Evolution

Albino Hedgehog Sez:  "Warning!  You may not be protected!"

Not Shit

Sleep Researchers Trying to Solve Puzzle of Why 

Sheldon Adelson Appears So Often in People's 

Nightmares

The Two Warning Signs of Kaintuckitis,

a Disease for Which There Is No Cure

When she heard that Mitt Romney had been an anti-gay 

high-school bully, the Queen of England got royally p-oed.

"So, Mr. Goldberg, when did you first begin to suspect 

that liberals were cheating in the war of ideas?"

Take away all its local, state, and federal subsidies and tax 

breaks, and Corporate America would collapse like a 

house of cards.

"Ms. Bachmann, in response to your Swiss citizenship, 

Mark Krikorian writes, 'The fact that even a patriot like 

Bachmann would do something like this is testament to

 how thoroughly the moral relativism of the post-national 

Left has permeated our culture'.  Do you recall what it

felt like when you first got permeated by moral relativism?"

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #385

Scott Boston

"You say, Mr. Romney (and I quote):  'My view is that 

marriage itself is a relationship between a man and women, 

and that’s my own preference'.  That sure sounds like the

definition of polygamy to me.  Does Ann agree with you

on this?"

Warm Scuzzies #293

Diageo

The Bipedal Buttsore Speaketh

Contrary to popular belief, Jonah Goldberg is not 

overweight.  He just pads his body like he does 

his resume.

Ernest P. Worrell swears that Representative Vern 

Buchanan (R-FL), when he's not grifting or grafting, 

speaks spam as a second language.

Other Things North Carolina Is Famous For

Krispy Kreme Donuts 

Winston Cigarettes

John Edwards

Ghastly Monsters and Blond Giants #145

Michelle Malkin and Bryan Preston

Mourdock Credits NeoConfederate Necktie for

Victory Over Lugar

Was Rick Santorum being raptured, or had he scored with 

Lindsay Lohan?  That was what Jay Leno wanted to know.

The Tyranny of Pulitzers: How Jonah Goldberg 

Cheats in the Battle of the Books

Indiana Republicans Trade One Dick for Another

Religiously speaking, Bacon Sundaes had kept them

apart for millennia.

Sorry, little one, but you've been thrown into this 

world and there's only one way to get out.

Veined Octopus Sez:  "Occupy Wall Street!

Also, Coconut Shells!"

In the singular, humans can be delightful.  

In the plural, dreadful.

He had pretty much given up on formulating a Unified 

Field Theory, but he was still working on a Conspiracy 

Theory of Conspiracy Theories.

Seamus Sez:  "Let sleeping dogs lie and lying dogs sleep, 

but Master Mitt should have to wear the Cone of Shame

 until Election Day, 2012." 

Sign of the Times #26

Romney Responds to Obama's

'Marxist' Campaign Slogan

If your brain hurts, would you want a Birther,

like Dr. John Whitley, operating on it?

Rick Santorum 'Endorsing' Mitt Romney

Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu Forming 

Broad Alliance to Take 'Bold' Action on Washday

"Even though I opposed it, the auto bailout was my idea."