Saturday, May 03, 2014

With his dying breath on the cross, Jesus concluded his 
principled defense of the death penalty.
Oklahoma Seeks Volunteers to Test Alternative Methods
 of Execution
"Who are you calling 'Big Nose', Conchface?"
Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #567
Steven Anderson

Friday, May 02, 2014

Warblogger Helmet
Lindsey Graham Sez:  "Some guy said this about me 
yesterday: the only reason I cared about Benghazi was 
because I have six tea party opponents. Well, if that's 
true, I'm the biggest scumbag in America."
[A scumbag, yes, but not necessarily the biggest in America, 
maybe not even the biggest in South Carolina.]
"Sean Hannity only called my comments 'ignorant, racist, 
repugnant, and despicable', not me.  Sean, you see, hates the
sin, not the sinner.
Alan Keyes Shows Solidarity with Cliven Bundy by Wearing
Cowboy Hat

Thursday, May 01, 2014

A new study has revealed that modern humans are no brainier 
than Neanderthals.  That's good news for Louie Gohmert.
Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #566
T. W. Shannon
Massive Bra Sale!  Hurry, Ends Tonight!
Coultergeist Sez:  "Donald Sterling is 
piece of crap covered with human skin."
"My brain hurts!"
What Senator Cruz Is Pointing Out Today #2
A Kaintuck Caguama

Wednesday, April 30, 2014

World's Worst Yobs #303
Jonathan Karl
Q:  Why did God create Oklahoma?
A:  To make Texas look good by comparison.
Once thought impossible, it is now generally believed
that Rochelle Sterling is even uglier than her husband.
Do you think your phone is smarter than you are?  If 
so, you may be suffering from 'Smartphone Anxiety'.
"Hi, welcome to Taco Bell!  May I take your order, please?"
"Yeah, give me three of those cellulose/trehalose/malto-
dextrin/torula yeast/potassium chloride/soy lecithin tacos."
"Regular or Supreme?"
"Oh, may as well make them Supreme."
"With or without the black pepper flavor, sir?"
"With, but go easy on the oats."
"That'll be $4.51."
When Rick Perry was recently re-baptized in Little Rocky 
Creek near Independence, Texas, the Ghost of Sam Houston 
was overheard to say, “I pity the fish downstream.”
“My burden is not to show that UFIA originalism is perfect,
 but that it beats the other alternatives, and that, believe 
me, is not difficult.”

Tuesday, April 29, 2014

Vladimir Poutine
"Oh, shut my mouth and call me Goober!"
Better watch out for those slippery slopes, Mark Cuban. 
You may have a perfect right to be a moron in this country, 
but not to be the racist owner of an NBA basketball team.
The Trinity as a Musical Instrument
Warm Scuzzies #463
Jenny Beth Martin
Rude Rhymes #67

Vorpal Hurling

Donald Sterling

Monday, April 28, 2014

What Senator Cruz Is Pointing Out Today #1
A Douche Canoe
Would Vanessa Perez (aka V. Stiviano)---artist, writer, chef, 
poet, stylist, philanthropist, owner of a Ferrari, two Bentleys, 
and a Range Rover, piece of tail, and 'girlfriend from Hell'---
'set up' Donald Sterling the Octogenarian?  Unpossible!
Free Molotov Cocktails Means It's 'Happy Hour' in Syria
Assad to Seek Third Term as President of Rubbleville
Coming Soon to a Theatre Near You #97
Sands of Iwo Jima 2:  Sergeant Stryker Strikes Out

Sunday, April 27, 2014

Donald Sterling, the Silvio Berlusconi of American Sleaze
David Brooks Sez:  "When it comes to cultural 
analysis, I ... am quasi-Marxist."
Warm Scuzzies #462
Gurbaksh Chahal
Ann Coulter Likens Bundy Ranch 'Mob' to 
Occupy Wall Streeters; Hilarity Ensues