Saturday, September 05, 2009

Allegories for Our Time #7
"Trust the Gorilla!" said the free market economists.
What Obama Will Say in His Health Care Address,
or
The Future Is Already Past, So Why Waste Your
Time Listening to Him Recite History?
Everyone knows about Matt Drudge's second career as
the behatted maestro of the right side of the Web. But
relatively few know about his first career as the
sideshow attraction,

Busty Salma, the Bearded Lady.
What went into the ground in 1957 wasn't nearly as
scary as what came out of the ground in 1961.

Demand for Electricity Sputters and Bills May Fall;
Coming Up Next--the Rupture or the Rapture?
The Grinch Who Stole Wall Street
KFC Double Down Sandwich Combo Revealed to Be
Sinister Plot by President Obama to Place Teabaggers
Under Cardiac Arrest
What was it about the wild blue yonder the
President of France found so fascinating?
"Sacre bleu, Prime Minister Singh! The sky
doesn't seem to be falling today!"
The tiger cub was chapfallen when it learned its species
had been created on Friday, the same day of the week
as human beings.

Sure, their music stank, but they
had learned how to cope with it.
"I told you not to buy that second-hand GPS on eBay!"
Ghastly Monsters and Blond Giants #15
Peggy Noonan, Ann Coulter, and Matt Drudge
Warm Scuzzies #6
Matt Barber
Celebrity Marshmallow Roast
Glenn Beck, a Tough Stain OxiClean Refuses to Get Out
They saw madness in his eyes and screamed,
"More, more, give us more!"
While exercising his Second Amendment right to keep and
bear arms, a Pennsylvania history buff accidentally fired a
2-pound cannonball through the wall of a neighbor's house
four hundred yards away.
Oxymorons for Our Time #1
Jobless Recovery
The new KFC Double Down Sandwich

really hits the spot.
Rightbloggers and Other
Internet Biohazards #3

Big Lizards
World's Worst Jobs #100
Indian Chili Pepper Dryer
The Wizard of Oz as a Youngster
World's Worst Yobs #129
Walter Williams
Sleeping Like a Decalogue
A Wingnut Parent's Nightmare
Glenn Beck Ingathers Two More Dumb Clucks

Friday, September 04, 2009

MSNBC Admits Pat Buchanan, a Raving Lunatic and
Hitler Apologist for All Seasons, Is Good for Ratings
If you happen to bump into David Ayres, CEO of
The Ashcroft Group, you might ask him about
the 2002 NCAA Men's Basketball Tournament.
"You say 40 civilians were killed?"
"Yessir, they got in the way while we were
saving the gasoline for democracy."
Warm Scuzzies #5
David Broder
The only 'green' Verizon gives a damn about
is the color of your money.
Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #83
Judson Hill
Another Texas legend has been immortalized,
this time in an opera, The Gonzales Cantata.
Looks like we're on a roller coaster, but it only goes down.

Thursday, September 03, 2009

Will Roger 'The Silencer' Stephens
be slapping Levi Johnston next?
The Unexpurgated Bible #24
"And then Ross, the Son of Douthat, spake yet another 750 

words unto them, and lo, they knew it was the Sabbath."
"Traficants All the Way Down" refers to an infinite regression
belief about Congress and the nature of politicians.
Rightbloggers and Other
Internet Biohazards #2

Ace of Spades
Ghastly Monsters and Blond Giants #14
Haley Barbour and Bobby Jindal
"No matter how carefully you plan, you never know when
someone is going to come and change the future. Just do
what your heart tells you."

"Ya know, that robot is making more sense all the time."
N. Gregory Mankiw

His Pet Gremlin
Rightbloggers and Other
Internet Biohazards #1

Don Surber

Wednesday, September 02, 2009

Remember when mixing the military
with cartoons made you laugh?

Why doesn't it anymore?
The Few. The Proud. The Cobra Blood Drinkers.
The Marines.
"Am I a coward? Well, billions of years from now
when the Sun dies and the Earth turns into a frozen
cinder, ask me again."