World's Worst Yoobs #99

Barbara Starr

Newt Gingrich's Presidential Campaign in Debt to

Moby Dick Airways for $451,946

"Having met privately with News Corp. executives 26 times

over the past 15 months, would it be fair to say, Prime Minister

Cameron. that you are better acquainted with them than you

are with your own cabinet?"

Representative King Diagnosed with VNSS

(Vehement Nativist Stare Syndrome)

After 35 years in office, Representative Dale Kildee (D-MI)

 has announced that he will not seek another term in 2012

and will retire. He was so invisible in Washington that

 most people thought he had retired 35 years ago.

Before we had time to learn more about Les,

he resigned as CEO of Dow-Jones.  Now

we'll know even less about Les.

Without fail, the Australian Basset Hound

would retrieve his master's morning

newspaper.

Teabagger William Temple Just Moments Before Being

Atomized by Imperial Death Star

Marcus Bachmann Makes Guest Appearance on

British £5 Note

"I was called to the ministry at age 27. Today, the governor's

office is my pulpit, where God has put me at this time to do

his will.  So I think that it's time for us to just hand the

government over to God and say, 'God, you're going to

have to fix this.'"

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #317

Gary Marbut

The Last Smile of the Skull Frogs

Pushmi-Pullyu Spotted on Floor of U. S. Senate

Mr. Generic Republican Widens Lead on Obama in Gallup Poll

Britney Spears' project to become a

tough old broad is on schedule and

under budget.

The Look on Michele Bachmann's Face

Right Before She Said, "Choot-spa!"

"Hello, Mr. Gladney?  This is Whiplash Willie Gingrich.

We need to talk."

Kenneth Gladney to Play Role of Harry Hinkle in Remake

of The Fortune Cookie

When asked why he wears a strainer on his

head, Niko Alm revealed that he is a

member of an esoteric atheist sect,

the 'Piccolini Pastafarians'.

Snidely Whiplash Rumored to Be Next CEO of News Corp.

Sarah Palin Delays Going Topless Until

Late August-Early September

Minnesota Shutdown Cutting Off Beer, Cigarettes;

Will 'No Suds and No Smokes' = Revolution?

"So what if polls out of Iowa show me at 2%!

Polls are meaningless!

People are meaningless!

I'm all that matters!"

Neonate Weighing 16 Pounds Enters World Crying,

 "Baconator Double, Stat!"

Gin and Tacos writes:  "If Marcus Bachmann was any more of

a queen, he would be on British money. That guy could not be

any gayer if he shot rainbows out of his open palms like some

kind of Spider Man."

The Bachmanns react.

Planking is out.  Owling is in.

Julia Hurley, Former Hooters Girl and Now Tennessee

Republican State Representative, Puts Down Her Plate

of Hot Wings and Carves Her Initials into Her Desk

Man's Penis Insinkerated

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #316

Mo Brooks

Erick Erickson, a Member of CNN's 'Best Political Team on

Television', Sez:  "It's time to burn Mitch 'Pontius Pilate'

McConnell in effigy!"

Disinterested Philanthropists Donate $86 Million to

Obama's Re-Election Campaign and the DNC in the

Second Quarter of 2011

Governor Rick Perry has declared August 6 as a Day of

Prayer and Fasting.  In order to keep the world in proper

balance, Fearguth hereby declares August 6 to be a Day

of Feasting and Merrymaking. 

Would you like to see Nikki Haley's

'Governor's Report Card'?  About as

much as you'd like to see the bubble

gum stuck under the seat at your local

cinema multiplex?  Thought so. 

Senator Inhofe Introduces Bill to Limit FAA Regulation

of Okies Wearing Anti-Gravity Belts

Moments Before Jack Nicholson's Mortarboard Made

Its Final Liftoff

The Unexpurgated Bible #57

Then the day came when Jesus turned wine into water. 

And his parched disciples marvelled at a miracle that

was so utilitarian.

"Hit the road, Newt!  Even your fabled Svengali-like powers

can't persuade me that the Supreme Court of the United

States is unconstitutional."

It was a 'deer in the headlights' moment when Senator

McConnell learned that bad gums had been linked to

erectile dysfunction.

Beetnik in Fearguth's Backyard Claims to Have Stung

Lawrence Ferlinghetti's Left Buttock Back in 1956

Why is Tina Brown so fascinated with

Sarah Palin's tits?

Hey, Dick Cheney!  You can hunt this unemployed Utah

man for only $10,000.  He has a thick pelt, a smooth hide,

is faster than a wild turkey and smarter than a wild boar.

And to improve your chances of bagging this wily prey,

why not invite Tony Scalia to join you? 

"I did NOT point my cute Ruger .380 at the reporter!

He recklessly stuck his chest in front of the barrel!" 

Rush Limbaugh Sez: "Obama Wants Budget Deal

in Time for Zappadan"

Thurston Howell III and Orrin Hatch were twins, separated

at birth.  Who knew?

Big Fan of the Military-Industrial Complex Applauds

 the House GOP's Refusal to Cut Defense Spending

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #315

Lori Klein

Of course, if it came down to either Michele Bachmann or

Nancy Grace for President . . . .

Sarah Palin Sez:  "I Can Win the Race for

GrandMILFident of the United States"

Warm Scuzzies #199

Rebekah Brooks

Police Department Apologizes for Revealing Cop's Bra Size