Muckraker

Rakemucker

Warm Scuzzies #162

Quantico Marine Base

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #283

Ron Gould

"The pension plan for the average member of

Congress is not that great.  .... If I were going to

retire off of what’s here, it would be pretty

slim pickens."

Pretty Slim Pickens

"Is there a proctologist in the audience?  I've got

lawsuits up the gazoo!"

Be circumspect about who you friend on Facebook.

He or she may be a Pentagon sock puppet.

Barack H. Obama Elementary School to Be Closed

and Dropped on Libya

Remember the Donkeyphant?  It's now extinct,

like David Broder.

"If legendary big-wave surfer Sion Milosky drowned at 

Maverick Beach, what am I, a Russell Terrier, doing

on this mother-frickin' surfboard?"

"Hey, Pop, I have a better idea!  Why don't you and Mom get

in the basket and I'll go see Kung Fu Panda 2?"

"I've not only seen House of Wax, I was Vincent

Price's stunt double in that picture.  You probably

didn't know that.  Anyway, have you ever seen it

in 3D?"

Bomb Libya,

or the

Best Franco-American Alliance Since
the Invention of SpaghettiOs®

What was it like when myths were first being formed,

when only the originals existed--before, as in our day,

there were so many copies, imitations, comparisons,

allegories, parables, metaphors, and analogies? Take

Narcissus, for example. When his contemporaries saw

 him gazing at his image in the pool, they wouldn't have

called him a 'Narcissist' or 'Narcissistic', would they?

So, what did they call him, before he, charmed by his

own image, fell into the pool and drowned? Do you

suppose they might have called him a 'Gingrichist'

 or, perhaps, 'Palinistic'?

Some say naps make you smarter.  But not in Governor Perry's

case.   Even if he pulled a Rip Van Winkle and slept for

twenty years, he would wake up in 1991 playing Darryl in

Thelma and Louise.

The Lincoln Lawyer

The Lincoln Pirate

What Men Should Wear to the Parousia

What Women Should Wear

"Don't believe the media when they say

I had sex with the Italian Prime Minister

 13 times.  If you know Silvio like I do,

you would know he suffers from

Triskaidekaphobia.  So we skipped

number 13."

American Schutzstaffel #7

Latter-Day Saint Says "I Think These Are the Latter Days"

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #282

Dan Ramos

If the Japanese Had Only Engraved 'In God We Trust'

on Their Nuclear Reactors

Howler Monkey

Howler Birther

"When I was 12, I used to hide out and steal Halloween

candy from children.  Isn't that awful? And now I'm

governor of Maine! Now that I'm governor of Maine,

there's nothing left to steal."

"They've given us the Prius. Even now,

Japanese refugees are recycling their

garbage. And yet, Gaia levels them!

Just wipes them out! Ha, ha, ha!

Wanna hear an even funnier

Diane Sawyer joke?"

"Radiation is actually good for you. 

Look what it's done for me."

Coming Soon to a Theatre Near You #51

National Lampoon's Ponzi Madness

Warm Scuzzies #161

Timothy Durham

Independent voters, like this young Arnold Schwarzenegger, 

say they would support Charlie Sheen over Sarah Palin for

President by a 41/36 margin.

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #281

Schaeffer Cox

No, these fine ladies aren't grieving over the tragedy in

Japan.  They're watching a Novice's Hurdle horse race at

the Cheltenham Festival in Gloucestershire, England.

"Goddammit!  Done stepped in a

pile of gohmert!"

Translated from Russian, the billboard reads:

"Never fly without a cape!"

"Senator DeMint, if you'll show me your

internal gyroscope, I'll show you mine."

“Two decades from now, when I'm 92, I would be willing to

take a look at Social Security. But I’m not willing to

take a look at it right now.”

America's unhappiest person is a short,

middle-aged, unemployed Muslim woman

who is separated from her husband and

lives in West Virginia on less than

$12,000 a year.  So, If you're not

this woman, quit your bitchin'!

World's Worst Yobs #214

Brent Littlefield

Virginia Middle-Schoolers Busted for Oregano Possession,

Listening to Parsley, Sage, Rosemary and Thyme

Warm Scuzzies #160

Sari Horwitz

World's Worst Yobs #213

Michael Totten

"'Anonymous' tried to blind me with porn!"

Reince Priebus criticizes Obama for putting the NCAA

bracket ahead of important issues, such as, the issue of

the President putting the NCAA bracket ahead of

important issues.

"Speaker Boehner, The Politico said today that you have a

'weakened hand'.  Is it your right or left, and has it affected

your golf game?"

Ghastly Monsters and Blond Giants #105

Michele Bachmann and Frank Gaffney

"Very good, Madame Secretary!  Now watch what

happens when I press the second button!"

Warm Scuzzies #159

Tom Ganley