Little Known Fact #53

Rats, next in line to become the species which rules

the Earth, are now setting mantraps.

A new study reveals that the average shoe in America has

 gone up two whole sizes since the 1970s.  There's a reason

for that.

Bad Deal

Raw Deal

Real Deal

Vladimir Putin is such an ardent believer

in the Second Amendment that he helps

Russian separatists in the Ukraine to get 

their hands on surface-to-air missiles.

Has Darrell Issa gone rouge?

If Todd Akin didn't exist, the Democratic Party would 

have to invent him.

Renee Ellmers Sez:   "Men do tend to talk about things on a 

much higher level."

[Q: What does Renee Ellmers and a beer bottle have in common? 

A: They're both empty from the neck up.]

"Next time, I'm wearing shoes!"

Psychiatrist Andrew Hodges Performing

 'Good Golly, Svengali!'

To tightly seal the Texas border with Mexico would require

a National Guardsman posted every three feet.  Since the

border is 1,255 miles long, 2,208,800 Guardsmen would be

required.  To loosely seal the border (i. e., a National

Guardsman posted every 300 feet), 22,088 Guardsmen

would be required.  There are currently 23,580 National

Guardsmen in Texas.  Go figure.

Ed Wood Sez:  "My son wears dresses, 

and that's OK with me."

Sheriff Paul Babeu is a rotten egghead.

Dweebs, Dorks, and Doofuses #52

Adam Kwasman

Entire Population of Oracle, Arizona to Be Traded

for Busload of Honduran Asylum-Seekers

Dick Cheney International Monument Opens in Siberia

World's Worst Yobs #308

Sheldon Richman

A new poll shows that 37% of Mississippi Republicans

would back the Confederacy if there were another Civil

War.  While that may be surprising, it's even more sur-

prising that 63% either wouldn't or aren't sure.

Nautilus Exploration Vessel Studying Goldman Sachs

Vampire Squid in the Gulf of Mexico

New Texas License Plate to Make It Easier to Round Up 

Perry-Style Secessionists When President Obama 

Declares Martial Law

The Kardashians:  Famous for Being Famous

The Cheneys:  Famous for Being Infamous

Utah Sets New Record for Number of Republican Attorneys-

General Arrested on the Same Day and Charged with a

 Total of Twenty-One Felonies and Two Misdemeanors

Archaeologists Say Ancestor of GOP Mascot Roamed

 North America 13,390 Years Ago

Warm Scuzzies #485

Heritage Academy (Mesa, AZ)

Was it Zell Miller doing his Rick Perry impression

or Rick Perry doing his Zell Miller impression?

Warm Scuzzies #484

Jeremy Yachik

"Sorry, Mr. Santelli, but from the time you call 'the best five

minutes of my life' until now, it would be impossible for you

to have been more wrong."

Non-Blonde Howard Kurtz Says "We Have 12 Non-Blondes

on Fox News"

Sir Galtalot Going Medieval on Somebody's Ass

Representative Mike McCaul (R-TX), the richest member

 of Congress, still hasn't fully recovered after seeing the 

'threat' posed by 17-year-old immigrants on the Texas-

Mexico border.

First Gorgeous Supermoon of the Summer

Bad Spellers of the World, UNTIE! #152

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #582

Kathy Perkins