Maybe Rob Schneider will show us how an empathetic

 impersonation of Trump should be done.

Hand-kissing is not in Trump's playbook.

"There's a sad day coming, 

A sad day coming, 

There's a sad day coming by and by; 

When the sinner shall hear his doom, "Depart, I know ye not," 

Are you ready for that day to come?"

Steny Hoyer is a face of the Democratic Party and it

ain't pretty.

Paul Ryan has been and forever will be a political kludge, 

i. e., "a quick-and-dirty solution that is clumsy, inelegant, 

inefficient, difficult to extend, and hard to maintain."

Trump Sez: "But last night I did watch a liar, leaker, and

his performance, by the way, was horrible, and I will say 

this, Anderson Cooper was surprisingly tough, and he 

did a good job."

Boy oh boy, was he surprised when he learned his

Superego worked for ESPN!

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #729

Patrick Colbeck

Adventures in Aestheticism #16

Scott Pruit doesn't look like an Okie and doesn't talk like an

 Okie. (He talks too fast and his voice is too thin and whiny.) 

Has anyone bothered to check his Okie papers?

Patrick Meehan (R-PA), Member of the House Ethics 

Committee,  Resigns to Avoid an Investigation into His 

Sexual Harassment Settlement

As wildlife photographer Marcio Cabral learned to his 

chagrin, one should never photograph an anteater when

 it is stuffed.

Christopher Cantwell Arrested for Drunkenly Re-Enacting

General Lee's Grand March Through Virginia

Don Blankenship, the Dark Lord of Coal, says the ghosts

of the 29 miners who died in his mines have endorsed 

him for membership in the Ninth Circle of Hell.

Yeezy, Patron Saint of Hypocrite-Hop

"Hey, North and South Korea, you can't denuclearize

without my permission and without thanking me!"

Trump Sez: "Kanye West performed a great service 

to the Black Community."

House Chaplain Pat Conroy Fired by Paul Ryan 

for Praying for Fair GOP Tax Legislation

Fearguth's Rules of Order #66

If a Golden-Mantled Howler wants to groom the 

President of France, permit it to do so, but feel free

 to criticize constructively its grooming style.

Theopompus of Kochtopia

Scott Adams, Dilbert's God, Channeling

Kellyanne Kanye

The EPA administrator suddenly found himself surrounded 

by 535 members of Congress who were---gasp!---'politically

 motivated'.

Adventures in Lexicology #24

Pompeosity (/pämˈē'äsədē/), n. Bumptious arrogance.

 [The Secretary of State was best known for his pompeosity.]

Pruitt Testifying on the Hill

The Candyman Bows Out

World's Worst Yoobs #199

Candace Owens

Pay-for-Play

Life, real and unreal, is complicated.

REVEALED: When it's time for pay-for-play, Mick

Mulvaney flashes the sign of Twin Three-Eared Sphincters.

"I have nothing to hide. I'm utterly corrupt and 

everybody knows it."

Trump's Bible

Now in 31 Flavors!

They Were Both Dragon Energy

Another Pizzagate? Anti-Gay Memories Pizza Parlor

 Is No More

Bridget Phetasy wore a Tucker Carlson

t-shirt in Los Angeles for a week before

someone said to her, "You must shop at

Goodwill."

At the White House state dinner, Michael Kors® showed 

the world what's new for spring.

BREAKING: Two Birds Killed with One Stone

Trump Stands Behind Ronny Jackson

Like Little Egypt, Chris Christie walks, he talks, he

crawls on his belly like a reptile.

It was hard to tell if Kevin Williamson was crawling

out of the woodwork or crawling back in.

Warm Scuzzies #799

George Clayton

"You say, Mr. Pompeo, that if the Rapture occurs during your

term as Secretary of State,  you would have to step down.

Should your opponents view this as a calamity or a blessing?"

Whiteworld #56

In the words of Sarah Huckabee Sanders,  

"The problem itself is growing and getting bigger.” 

Old Stoner Age Icons Say Marijuana Is Out, Unpasteurized 

Dairy Products Are In

"I will fear no evil: for Gnome Chomsky

 art with me."

Natural Born Yeti Killer

Germany in 1938? No, America in 2018.

Jean-François Millet's Masterwork Gets an Update

Canine Humor

Nancy Magritte