Tony Hayward Gets Life Back, Licks Wounds

at Yacht Race

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #176

Jane Norton

Double Murderer Executed Twice by Firing Squad in Utah

You look like the kind of person who's been around

the block a couple of times. So, would you say that

you're one of the Small People, the Lesser People,

or the Little People?

Republican Party Re-Brands Again

Warm Scuzzies #85

Gulf of Mexico Foundation

Sharron Angle After Her Mouth Was De-Foamed

Thursday had been a bitch, so Congressman

Barton decided to take the day off.

Just when you thought the former House

Minority Leader would never enter your

field of vision again, Dick Gephardt pops

up as a lobbyist for Sodexo, the military

contractor that specializes in supplying

tainted food to the Marines.

"Behold while I play my Invisible Hand Maracas

with FreedomWorks abandon!"

"You weren't expecting me, were you? Tell the

truth, now: you were really expecting the

Spanish Inquistion!"

"I would rather die."

"Quite rightly, you should. Do you

have any idea when that might be?"

The Anointing of Fearguth at Havasu Falls

October, 2006

Yes, everything changed on September 11, 2001,

just like it has every day before and since.

Representative Joe Barton (R-TX) Apologizes (at

3:00 p.m.) for Apology (at noon) for Apology (at

10:00 a.m.); Sets New Congressional Record for

Number of Apologies Made in a Five-Hour Period

"And if anything I've said this morning has been misconstrued

... I want to apologize for that ... misconstruction."

[Which, being interpreted, means Smokey Joe Barton has now

apologized for OUR failure to construe correctly what HE said.

This is what is popularly called a 'non-apology apology'.]

It took eight years, but Harrison Ford and Callista

Flockhart finally tied the knot, a new knot not yet

included in The Ashley Book of Knots.

Corporate Felon

Corporate Fellator

According to reliable sources on the right, this

is Debbie Schlussel's rocker, which, they say,

she is off of at the moment.

Electorate Reaches Tipping Point: More Americans Will

Run for President in 2012 Than Will Vote for Them

No matter how hard he tried, Dr. Emilio Lizardo

could not outcrazy the teabaggers.

"It is a tragedy of the first proportion that a

private corporation can be subjected to what I

would characterize as a shakedown, in this

case a $20 billion shakedown. I apologize.

I do not want to live in a country where any

time a citizen or a corporation does something

that is legitimately wrong is subject to some sort

of political pressure that is -- again, in my words,

amounts to a shakedown. So I apologize. Tony

Hayward, you've got a mighty fine ass, and I

really enjoy kissing it on national TV!"

Ardi Rizal: Only Two Years Old

and Already Multitasking

Bob Somerby Experiencing Nine Degrees of Separation

Petraeus Bounces Back, Pitches Two-Hit Shutout

Tool

James Risen, Another Tool

Edgar Steele, Author of Defensive Racism,

Arrested in Plot to Kill His Wife, His

Mother-in-Law, and to Star in My Own

Private Fargo

Smoking Plane Makes Landing to Empty Ash Trays

Tunku Varadarajan Sniffs Blanche Lincoln, Says

She's "the Most Fragrant Democrat That Any

Republican Could Envision"

Rightbloggers and Other

Internet Biohazards #53

Looking at the Left

Rodent Expert Shines Light on Rats in NYC Subways

Papuan Tribesman Endorses Sarah Palin's Plan for

Little Dutch Boy to Plug Oil Leak with Thumb

Touchdown Jesus to Be Rebuilt, But Not Out of

Butter This Time

Grim Fairy Tales #1

There was an old woman who lived in

a shoe.

Her foot was so big she didn't know

what to do with her many children.

So she left them out in the street

to fend for themselves.

Colonel Muammar Al-Gaddafi was very displeased

when he realized he was drinking a cheap knockoff

of Reál Sangria.

The Face That Launched a Thousand D'ohs!

"Overdressed? Perhaps. But have you ever considered

the possibility that you may be underdressed?

"Believe me, bending over backwards to please someone

is not nearly as effective as it's cracked up to be."

She had finally found a use for the genuine

hand-hammered wok she had bought late

one night in the 1990s while watching a

particularly entertaining food infomercial.

Before God Revealed to 'Touchdown Jesus' in a Flash

of Lightning That He Hates Football and Loves Soccer
After

So you didn't make Time magazine's list

of the 100 most influential people? To

what do you attribute your good fortune?

Charlie Daniels, NeoConfederate Boy of Leather

Sign of the Times #10

U. S. Central Commander General David Petraeus

Collapses While Testifying Before Congress about

America's Feckless Wars

"Using my sixth sense, I can tell you this bowl is

full of acorns from south of the border."

Beware of Greeks Bearing Bonds

World's Worst Yobs #169

Jimmie Bice, Jr.

"Quite frankly, Congressman King, if you're the best

that the white man has to offer, no wonder your race

is doomed to marginalization."