Trucker Hat Holds Press Conference After 

Surgery to Remove Yoooge Tumor

At a mere 5 mm in length, the Peacock Spider shows you 

don't have to be big, rich, famous, or powerful to be a dancer.

Little did they know the camel would have them arrested 

for 'public display of affection'.

Do you ever feel over-smoked?

Were he to ever say, "I made a mistake," Donald 

Trump would collapse like a Jenga Tower.

Like Little Egypt, Paul Ryan crawls on his belly 

like a reptile.

If you go to GOP.com, the official website of the

Republican National Committee, you will find

no mention of Donald Trump.

"I don't have thin skin!"

Zachary Taylor Endorses Donald Trump, Believes Trump

 Can Demolish the Republican Party as Totally as He

 Did the Whig Party

Tick-Tick-Tick-Tick

Gentleman Perry Urges Gentleman Trump to 

Peel Lady Clinton's Skin Off

Coming Soon to a Theatre Near You #137

Talk Dirty to Us, Donald!

"Lord save us!" cried Dab-Dab the duck. 

"How does it make up its mind?"

"It doesn't look to me as though it had any," 

said Jip the dog.

"Ken Paxton is sure looking pale these days."

"Yeah, to keep his crooked ass out of jail,

his lawyers are bleeding him dry."

"My left nut is money, my right nut is lawyers, and

they're both yoooge."

Trump Marks His Territory

"You say, Mr. Starr, 'The captain goes down with the ship'.  

Does that include the hat?"

A Fool and His Money Are Soon Parted by Another Fool

Donald Trump promises to do to America what 

Hugo Chavez did to Venezuela.

Meanwhile, the Banana Republican Dreamed His Dreamy Dream

What if Barack Obama had called an ABC News reporter

 'a sleaze' in 2008?  It's highly unlikely he would be 

President Obama eight years later.

There's a reason why Trump's hair seems more

golden than ever.

Call It 'Political Recalibration'

North Korea Praises 'Wise' Fling Poo,

Slams 'Dull' Clinton

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #660

Danny Perkins

Were Trump to start flinging peanut butter

instead of poo, should it be creamy or

extra crunchy?

"What is oblong and purple and raisin hell?"

"Wingnut Commander the Grape."

"Oh, lookie, it's Rocky the Flying Squirrel!"

Remember They Live?

Let Not the Sun Go Down Upon Your Wrath

Matt Groening's New Book

It Came from Beyond the Planet of the Ultra-Vixens

"What is Pocket Gopher saying about Trump these days?"

"Nothing.  All it does is snort in disgust."

Travelers on World's Biggest Cruise Ship Complain, Say 

Ship Should Be Re-Christened, Disharmony of the Seas

Snipers Take Aim at American Sniper,

Blow Big Hole in His Curriculum Vitae

Coming Soon to a Theatre Near You #137

Rambo 5: The VA Years

On this Memorial Day, let us remember Dick

 Cheney, the draft dodger who sent 4,492 

U.S. soldiers to die in Iraq.

Like The Shadow, this Pure Libertarian clouds men's 

minds so they cannot see him.

Tourists Waiting Expectantly for Cruise Ship USS America 

to Go Over Niagara Falls

Dissing Susana Martinez, the Republican Governor of 

New Mexico, was a threefer for Trump: he thumbed 

his nose at the GOP, Latinos, and women.

Hipster Lincoln Drinks PBR, But He Doesn't Endorse It

"If you looked like me, you would be a jihadi, too."

'

Roaches had outlasted the dinosaurs, but Joe and Mika

 posed a serious existential threat.