To make your hell-broth boil and bubble,

don't forget to add Eye of Newt.

Two-Minute Haters #23

David Caton

Why are many corporate CEOs, like Robert Niblock of

Lowe's, such morally dessicated creatures?

Warm Scuzzies #246

Amy Koch

"Can you feel the love tonight?

The peace the evening brings

The world, for once, in perfect harmony

With all its living things."

The Politico Illustrated #17

'Newt just wants to have fun'

For embarrassing Texas and Texans in the

eyes of the world, Governor Perry is getting

 a $92,400-a-year raise.  No wonder two-

thirds of the American people think

politicians, like lobbyists, used car

 salesmen, and telemarketers, have

'low' or 'very low' ethical standards.

Raymond Davis, Ex-CIA Contractor and Firearms Instructor,

Charged with Felony; Will the CIA Ransom Him Again?

Warm Scuzzies #245

Greg Davis

Said the TSA agent to Mark Meckler, "Is that a Glock 27

in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?"

If he is such a great historian, why can't Newt Gingrich

remember when, as a lobbyist just two years ago, he

favored health-care legislation which included

an 'individual mandate'?

Factoid of the Hour #13

Minnesota Shoplifter Hides $6,500 Mink Coat in Her

Drawers, Is Arrested and Jailed, But Coat Isn't

Discovered Until Three Days Later

"Yeah, all I needed to land this baby was a remote

control unit I bought on eBay."

Ghastly Monsters and Blond Giants #131

Sheldon Adelson and Michael Milken

Greedheads Galore #19

David W. Nelms

Hitch's Last Stand

Having smashed the last pot, the Americans

decided to close their Baghdad Pottery Barn.

Question: Who said, "I must say again I have never seen an

uglier bus than a Canadian one”?

Answer: John McCain -- bus observer and international

authority on the aesthetics of mass transit design.

Denmark Imposes World's First Fat Tax,

Causing Butter Shortage in Nearby Norway

"Systemic discrimination against Latinos with

 practices that violate federal law and the

Constitution?"  Say it ain't so, Joe!

"He's from Georgia and claims a witch

turned him into a Newt!"

Victoria's Secret Revealed! 

Child Labor Utilized to Harvest

 Cotton Used in Making Panties

Rare Photo of the Very First Iowa GOP Caucuses,

 Held Sometime During the Paleocene Epoch

Oxymorons for Our Time #116

Conservative Soul

Newt Gingrich Sez:  "The GOP establishment is proving that

I, like a leper, am an outsider."

“I appreciate that 99 percent of you want to have an

intelligent discussion and won’t be drowned out by

the 1 percent.”

With that much smoke, Newt must be in there somewhere.

Dweebs, Dorks, and Doofuses #4

Tony Keck

Grandpa Walnuts Mourning End of Iraq War

Herman Cain Sez:  "I want to be Secretary of Defense in

Toad Suck, Arkansas."

"We understand, Tom, that the Iraq War ended when

the military ran out of Friedman Units."

"Now, children, repeat after me:  'No more class warfare'."

The GOP 'Brain Trust'---Ross Douthat, Charles Krauthammer,

George Will, David Brooks, Peggy Noonan, David Frum,

Karl Rove, Michael Gerson, and National Review--- is

appalled at the prospect of Newt Gingrich winning the

GOP nomination for President.  Don't you just love it

when the chickens come home to roost?

Imaginary, Photoshopped Headline

World's Worst Yobs #233

Christian Schneider

CNN Talking Head Cracks Up During Report

on At-Home Sperm Bank

Puerto Rican Mayor's Family Celebrates

Rudolph's Last Christmas

Mitt Romney's Road to Victory

Attila the Hun Sez:  "Newt Gingrich is not conservative enough.

Only I am conservative enough!"

Move over, Joe Walsh!  Three women call

 Terrell Owens a 'Deadbeat Dad', not just one.

Warm Scuzzies #244

Richard Land

Newtrino:  a Subatomic Particle That Can Grift

Faster Than the Speed of Light

Newt's Best Friend

Little Known Fact #22

More doctors smoke camels than any other

even-toed ungulate.

Don't take any Wooden Nickels

or

Romneybacks.

Pantomime Horse

Pantomime Human

Christine O'Donnell Sez:  “Mitt Romney's been consistent

 since he changed his mind. .... He’s open to other viewpoints,

and if it doesn’t betray his core convictions, he’ll make the

necessary changes.”

Rick Perry Blames Total Body Freezes on Inertia Projector

Operated by Karl Rove