Saturday, June 18, 2011

When lexicographers added the word, 'vicious', to our
English-language dictionaries, they doubtless had
Andrew Breitbart in mind.
Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #309
Chris Harris
"Oh, I wish I were an Oscar Mayer wiener!
That is what I truly wish to be!
'Cause if I were an Oscar Mayer wiener!
Then everyone would be in love with me!"

Friday, June 17, 2011

"Can you believe your eyes, dear? It's the GOP
Frontrunner of the Week!"
Did you hear that Lady Baba's Red Meat Tea Party
Dress has been added to the Rock and Roll Hall of
Fame?
Remember when Michelle Malkin could smile and
chew gum at the same time?  That was during what
her admirers now refer to as her 'Multitasking
Period'. 
No matter how much soap and water he used, he couldn't
wash away what was left behind after he took a dip in a
'fountain filled with blood drawn from Emmanuel’s veins'.
U.S. Considers Charging Syria with War Crimes;
Pot Calls Kettle Black
Joe and Hadassah Lieberman say they're
ready to join Glenn Beck in 'Restoring
Courage' to cowardly Israelis on
August 24, 2011. 
"I learn something new every day.  Last week, for instance,
 I learned that this gesture is called 'UFIA', which means,
'Unsolicited Finger in the Anus'.  Unless you're a member
of the GOP, you really can't imagine how useful it is."
Jay Carney, President Obama's Press Secretary, Hospitalized
After Suffering Inquinal Hernia from Laughing Too Hard at
Speaker Boehner's Best Weiner Joke
Welfare Queen

Welfare King
Warm Scuzzies #192
Scott Beason
Were the authorities to start profiling men
with red hair and pale skin, Josh Treviño
would change his first name to José and
start speaking with a Tex-Mex accent.
"Po-ta-toe?  Hmmm."
World's Worst Yobs #222
James 'Bo Snerdley' Golden
Don't you just hate spoilers?

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Q:  "How can you tell the difference between Callista
Gingrich and a wax dummy at Madame Tussauds?"
A:  "You can't."
"I'm the one who's unemployed.  You're just a 
wealthy douchebag!"
San Francisco Moves Toward
 Banning Sale of Goldfish
Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #308
Marcus Bachmann
Warm Scuzzies #191
Right Turn USA
Bin Laden Deputy Zawahiri Takes Over as Al-Qaida Leader
"Eat you heart out, Anthony Weiner!"
Greedheads Galore #10
William Stamps Farish III
"Yellow matter custard, dripping from a dead dog's eye.
Crabalocker fishwife, pornographic priestess,
Boy, you been a naughty girl you let your knickers down.
I am the eggman, they are the eggmen.
I am the walrus, goo goo g'joob."

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

She had begun to suspect that the
size of the human head had not
kept pace with the evolution
of the comb.
What?  The United States was fighting wars in only 
Afghanistan, Iraq, Pakistan, Libya, and Yemen?  That's
only five wars at one time!  He had his heart set on SIX
before finally being wrinkled to death.  Was President
Peace Prize going to let him down?
"Anthony Weiner is a freak, Anthony Weiner is a freak!"
Texas Governor's Secret Strategy for Bagging GOP
Presidential Nomination Exposed
Now at Pottery Barn!
The Official John Edwards
Mugshot Coffee Mug!

Don't Vacillate, Don't Oscillate:  Voscillate!
Sign of the Times #14
"I am thankful for laughter," God said, "except when
milk comes out of my nose."
World's Worst Yobs #221
Ladd Ehlinger, Jr.
Running for city dogcatcher?  If so, you might consider buying
an endorsement from one of these well-known talkers.
If Fred Thompson Had Been an Aggie Blowhard
with Big Hair

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Flag Desecration #45
Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #307
David Barton
Asked when he planned to organize a new
Hamiltonian-National Greatness Party, David
Brooks said he really only had time, over the
 next 16 months, to piss and moan from his
perch at the New York Times.
Never misoverestimate Herman Cain.
"Other than posing as an online lesbian, sir,
what do you do for a living?"
“Debates are competitions," says Alex Castellanos, 
"they are alpha dog battles.”  He should know.
"Remember me, Sarah?  I'm one of the better avenging
angels of your nature."

Monday, June 13, 2011

Grumpy Extra Unhappy That Snow White Will Be a
No-Show When the Seven Dwarves Debate Tonight
in New Hampshire
Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #306
Bill Warren
Ghastly Monsters and Blond Giants #115
Dana Loesch and Jim Hoft
Rightbloggers and Other
Internet Biohazards #100
Uncoverage
David Mamet says "I'm  f—ing f—ed crazy about
Sarah Palin!"  He would, wouldn't he?
Beaky Buzzard Sez:  "People say my
 neck reminds them of

Ann Coulter."