To All New Owners of AK-47s in Butler, Missouri

Lest ye be chastised by the National Rifle Association,
do not refer to your new AK-47 as an 'Assault Weapon'.
It is a 'Semi-Automatic Battle Rifle' (SABR). And don't let
anybody make fun of you because your SABR happened to
be invented by

Mikhail Kalashnikov, a Russian member of the
Communist Party and sworn enemy of United States.
That, of course, was just an accident of his birth. His
heart was obviously in the right place. And had he
been born in the U. S., he would have doubtless been
a lifetime member of the NRA.