With his Amazon Prime membership, he now had free,

unlimited access to over 10,000 videos. Even if each

 were only one hour long and even if he were to view

 them nonstop from now on, it would take him over

59 weeks to watch all 10,000. That's when he

realized that he was the target of a big, gigantic 

global plot to waste his time, thereby preventing

him from discovering the cure for wingnut

thumbsucking.