Try to imagine how pangolin scales are used in 

financial rituals. Sounds kinky!

"Honey, it's another one of those damn

 panhandling anteaters!"

As wildlife photographer Marcio Cabral learned to his 

chagrin, one should never photograph an anteater when

 it is stuffed.

Sean Spicer Sez: "If it looks like a duck, walks like 

a duck, swims like a duck, and quacks like a duck, 

then it's probably an Aardvark."

If you wished to get Salvador Dali riled up, 

all you had to do was say, "Nice Aardvark!"

While overseas, Senator Cotton developed a taste for 

Echidna in the Raw.  He says it makes a delicious 

snack when you use its beak like a straw to suck

the juices out.

Have a Dad who seemingly has everything? Well,

have you ever thought about giving him a Smoked

Anteater for Father's Day?

"Granted, I'm a fake giraffe. But you're

really not an anteater, are you?"

Pangolins are notorious panhandlers. Please do what

you can to help break them of this nasty habit.

"Call me lazy, and I'll call you another victim

of the Puritan work ethic."

Can you imagine a better way to spend a lazy Sunday
 afternoon?

Ethologists are still searching for an explanation

of why Cess, a short-beaked echidna, blows bubbles

every time it watches The Lawrence Welk Show.