"Just curious, Mr. Blankfein, but when you and your kind need
a place to stuff $144 billion in new bonuses, how long do you
have to stand in line at Mattress Giant?"

"But, Senator, each Jujyfruit is this long. So shoving $9

million worth of them up my ass wouldn't be a bonus,

believe me!"

Goldman Sachs stunned many in the Wall Street community

Friday by awarding chief executive Lloyd Blankfein $9 million

as his year-end bonus, far less than the $100 million many
 were anticipating, and none of it in cash. All of it was
in Jujyfruits.

Goldman Sachs Shareholders Ask Bank To Cut
Down HUGE Bonuses to Help Calm Angry Mobs

Very Popular Right Now with Bonus Babies at Goldman Sachs

Even though it has five letters and literally
means 'good', bonus, in our time, has been
made an honorary four-letter word.

After leading the United States Postal Service into

the red to the tune of $3 billion last year, Postmaster

General John Potter was rewarded with a $135,000

bonus added to his base salary of $263,575. You may

wish to remember this when the price of postage

goes up again in May.