"No, I'm not Marty Peretz, and I've never

heard of The New Republic."

Marty Peretz When He Was Young and Grayscale

"Oh, no, it hurts so good I don't understand.

Heart beats heavy like a big bass drum,

I'm losing all equilibrium.

Infatuation - infatuation - infatuation."

The Petty Tyrant at Sunset

The Wild One at 72

From Marty Peretz's Private Porn Stache

In the 1950s, dancing was considered 'foreplay'.

In 2010, it has come to encompass everything,
except, perhaps, having an after-smoke and
discussing why Marty Peretz finds Camels
so satisfying.

Rude Rhymes #25

Odious Pets

Marty Peretz

"Happy to meet you, Congressman Paul! I'm Jamie
Kirchick, Marty Peretz's bitch."

Peretz the Pigot

World's Worst Yobs #45

Marty Peretz

Marty the Organ Grinder and Jamie the Monkey

Entertaining Prospective TNR Subscriber

"When Clinton came into the state," says Marty Peretz,
"Lieberman and Lamont were running dead even in the
polls, more or less. Clinton's appearance began Lieberman's
decline. My decline, on the other hand, began when I
compared Michael Kelly to Thucydides."

For the first time in history, a sinking ship, the

USS Joseph Lieberman, has abandoned all

rats on board, including David Brooks, Marty

Peretz, the Lieberkidz, and Richard Goodstein.