Remember Tom DeLay?  He has a new gig.

"Were you aware, Mr. DeLay, that the judge added three

months to Hastert's prison sentence after reading your

letter of support?"

"Dennis Hastert is a good man who loves the Lord. He gets 

his integrity and values from Him. He doesn't deserve what

 he is going through."

"Good news, Governor Perry!  Your indictment won't be 

any more damaging than Tom DeLay's.  Now, hold still

while I remove all those worry lines from your forehead."

If, as Tom DeLay says, "God wrote the Constitution," 

this would mean He was the author of the 3/5ths Compromise, 

whereby an African-American slave was counted, for political 

purposes, as only 60% of a person.  Furthermore, if God 

wrote it, the Constitution must have been perfect.  So why 

has He allowed this perfect document to be amended by

 mere mortals 27 times?

Justin Bieber and Tom DeLay Hook Up to Score Big

 Endorsement Deal with Mugshots Я Us

God is talking to Tom DeLay once more, telling him to lead a

'Constitutional revival'.  And if that means revolution in the

streets, so be it.  Ah, conservatism!

Do you remember the creep on the left?  Yes, that's

Tom DeLay, and he's still a creep.  

"What's that?"

"That's the husk of Tom DeLay, all that was left after his

lawyers sucked him dry trying to keep him out of jail."

The Three Most Pressing

Questions of Our Time

1. Are we there yet?

2. Are we having fun yet?

3. Is Tom DeLay in prison yet?

Judge Gives Tom DeLay Three Years in Prison;

"Should Be Enough Time to Wipe That Smile

Off His Face," Judge Says

"Tom DeWho?" said the Rightbloggers.

Texas Bug Man Fumigated

Ghastly Monsters and Blond Giants #111

Pamela Geller and Tom DeLay

If you're Tom DeLay, what a drag it is

getting old.

"Miss me yet?"

Look at Tom DeLay and Calvin's doctrine of 'Total

Hereditary Depravity' starts to make a whole lot

of sense.

"Oh, look! Tommy has developed

a stress fracture in his wee-wee!"

"Tom DeLay, if you're such a goddam Dancing with the

Stars hotshot, try this!"

Oxymorons for Our Time #5
Family Values Libertarian