McCain Surrogate's Reaction When Asked

to Appear on the Rachel Maddow Show

Former Senator Bill Frist wants to build an 8-foot

wall around his home in Nashville. "I'll feel much

more secure within my own Green Zone," he says.

After retiring from the Senate, Dr. Bill Frist says he will
open a new YouTube-based, remote-diagnosis practice.
All his patients will need to do is upload a video and send
him $125 via major credit card or PayPal. He says his
diagnoses will be emailed promptly within five

business days.

"Take a look at this card! It proves I was once the

Senate Majority Leader. How could you possibly

have already forgotten someone as important as me?

You must be suffering from Alzheimer's!"

Senator Hutchison felt like the third wheel

at the Republican Policy Lunch with Senator

Frist and Lady Thatcher.

Another indicator of what a pusillanimous hockey

puck Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist is, is this ad,

sprinkled around the right-wing blogosphere, paid

for by Volpac, Frist's own Political Action Committee.

Speaker Hastert grew increasingly exasperated

when the Iraqi Prime Minister's lengthy remarks

kept him from his 3:00 o'clock feeding.

Senator Frist Opens Piehole, Nothingness Escapes

The eclipse of Senator Bill Frist has begun.

After the Senate unanimously approved legislation to

raise the fines against radio and television stations for

obscenity, Senator Frist said, "Parents should be able to

watch television with their children without worrying

about exposing them to unsuitable content." In theory, this

may be true. But, in practice, bigger fines won't have much

effect, since parents and children haven't watched

television together since the days of Ozzie and Harriet.

As they planned their Three Stooges Revival

Tour, Joe, Bill, and John couldn't agree

on who would get to play Curly.

"Some doctors have diagnosed the SRLC

as being in a 'persistent vegetative state'.

Well, this time, I'm afraid they're correct."

Just why the SRLC delegate ended up at

Lost and Found eventually became clear.

"Get serious, Bob!

You've never heard of fristing?"

"No, no, no! These are NOT fisties!

These are fristies."