When the Ring-Tailed Lemur was asked, "Are you

an Objectivist?" all it did was stare in disbelief.

One in Five Americans Think Obama Is Muslim and Can't

Find Their Asses with Both Hands, a Flashlight, and a Map

Joe Farah Steals Tom

Friedman's Pornstache

Coward Dean

Taiwanese Corporation Adds New Feature to Its

Manufacturing Plants---Suicide Nets to Catch

Jumping Employees

'Operation Iraqi Freedom' Ends, 'Operation

Unending Occupation' Begins

Airline to Start Charging Extra for Planes to Land

NeoHomocons, PaleoHomocons, and CrazyHomocons

Gather to Hear Ann Coulter Perform 'Snooky Ookums'

Rude Rhymes #21

Unsightly Crock

Rupert Murdoch

"I'm quitting my radio show so that I can regain my

First Amendment right to say the N-word as many

times as I wish."

Patrick Gray Sharp will soon be forgotten, but

something he said should be remembered:

"I love guns more than toothpaste!"

"Check out these lips, Angelina!"

"What do you think, soldier?"

"I don't have to think.

I have plenty of ammo."

"In my opinion, the Serpent was the hero in the

Garden of Eden, not the villain."

Fearguth's Rules of Order #42

If you've never picked a seal's nose,

don't start now.

"Screw my 'Inner Housewife'! I was born

to play the fiddle like Allie Kral!"

"I, Seisaku-Kun, am a lowly robot.

But even I am smart enough to

ignore politics."

Two-Minute Haters #12

Robert Spencer

"Jesus loves me! this I know,

for the Bible tells me so."

"Before serving me tea, I trust you have used Purell,

the #1 doctor recommended hand sanitizer."

"This election is brought to you by the letter F

and the number 3."

"If I had to pick my favorite song from the

1960s, it would be Donovan's 'Yellow Jello'."

"The American mercenaries will be forced

to leave Afghanistan, cross my heart and

hope to die!"

"No, I did not appear in Planet of the Apes.

Why do you ask?"

You know times are tough when the Baptist General

Convention of Texas starts laying people off.

Obama Redefines What He Meant When He

Supported Mosque at Ground Zero, Succeeds

in Pissing Off Everybody

Democratic vs. Republican Tax Plans

Republican Tax Plan as a Hat

Rightbloggers and Other

Internet Biohazards #62

The Liberal Heretic

Spatula City Supercenter to Be Built at Ground Zero,

Next Door to the

New York Dolls Gentlemen's Club

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #200

Mike Pompeo

Kellogg's Accuses General Mills

of Being 'Cereal Liar'

"The charges against me are bogus. I don't even

own a pornograph!"

Nut and Yahoo

Where Bullshit Originates

That was when Jesus returned. And, for the first time

in human history, it was bad news for Republicans.

Might Makes Right:

The Teabaggers' Constitution

A bridge over troubled waters he could handle.

But a troubled bridge over troubled waters?

That seemed a bit risky.

"Along about that time, doctor, was when she

started letting her Emoticons run wild."

"Smile, Madame Chancellor! The German

economy is booming!"

Don't Let Emotions Rule Your Funeral-Cost Decisions!

Down Tomball, Texas, way, they call

this hairstyle the 'Debbie Riddle'.

Whiteworld #5

"If we get any whiter, people will have to start looking

at us through a prism in order to tell us apart!"

Recently-Declassified Photograph #21

Senator Vitter's Hooker Bed

"Sean Hannity has distanced himself so

far from you, Mr. Turner, he can't even

remember how to pronounce your first

name."

Oxymorons for Our Time #55

Serious Sin

Rightbloggers and Other

Internet Biohazards #61
Argghhh!!!

The word on the street is that you didn't

make the conservative bloggers' list of

'The 25 Worst Figures in American

History'. What a loser!