Trump Cancels First Trip to Latin America; 

"Too Many Rapists Down There," He Says

Even More Exciting Than the 

Falklands War

Pence says Trump's threat to jail Hillary “was one of the

 better moments of the debate.” He seems excited at the 

prospect of being Numero Dos in a Trump junta.

Generalissimo Don Juan Trump Threatens to Jail

His Political Opponent, Hillary Clinton

The Great Stone Head of Indiana Challenges the 

Great Stone Head of San Lorenzo for Hegemony

 in the Americas

Donald Trump promises to do to America what 

Hugo Chavez did to Venezuela.

Meanwhile, the Banana Republican Dreamed His Dreamy Dream

This Way to the Junta, Ladies and Gentlemen

Man Lost in Andes Since May Lived on Rats and 

What He Thought Were Raisins

Little Know Fact #35

Jaguars in South America gnaw on the 

roots of the Caapi plant until they begin 

to hallucinate and imagine they are

VW Microbuses.

One of the largest and most dangerous snakes in South

 America, the Bushmaster, is capable of multiple-bite 

strikes and the injection of large amounts of venom,

just like its North American cousin, the Bushmaster 223.

Think of it:  if religious freedom in the United States today 

were absolute, you could legally sacrifice young children

 like the Incas did in the good old days.

Ask Mitt Romney which America he believes in, and

he will say, "Both:  North America on even-numbered

days and South America on odd-numbered days."