Just in Time for Christmas!

Chavez Forever Dolls!

For Sale: Cheap!

Months later, the President of Venezuela realized his Songs

for Always CD was what turned a majority of his people

against him and interrupted his quest for more power.

But then he started receiving a monthly bill for the

number of cubic feet his body occupied. Shortly

thereafter, he declared bankruptcy and went into

receivership.

"Gosh! My end is nearer than I thought!"

"Over here, the tale is called 'Little Black Riding Hood',

there are no wolves, and the last fairy was beheaded

right after the British left."

Pushing 50, Louise Ciccone Ritchie understands

more clearly what it means to be a 'material girl'.

Reduced to tears by the National Intelligence Estimate,

Mahmoud Ahmadinejad now suspects U. S. intelligence

agencies are conspiring to undermine his presidency.

National Intelligence Estimate Ranks President

Bush as World's #1 Threat to Intelligence

Dinner for Someone on a Starvation Diet

The Kabul resident claimed he had been framed.

Today is the first day of Zappadan, the annual

festival hosted by The Aristocrats to celebrate

Frank Zappa, the man and his music. Admission

is absolutely free. Remember: it is customary to

take your clothes off when you dance.

"Yeah, Sergei, I know the box I'm carrying is full

of ballots. But I sometimes think Russia simply

gets too much snow to be a democracy. Democracy,

you know, was invented in Athens, and it doesn't

snow there but once in a blue moon."

World's Worst Jobs #67

Afghani Cotton Weaver

Prince Faisal Bin Al Meshaal Bin Saud Bin

Abdul-Aziz Getting His Oil Changed

"Remember, Hillary, Bill never attacked the character

of his opponents, even when they were Republicans."

"Senior intelligence officials were wrong about Iraq

having WMD in 2003, so they're probably wrong about

Iran not having WMD in 2007. It's called a Catch-43."

Here's a gift for that special someone on your

Christmas shopping list who has everything:

a year's supply of whirling dervishes.

When he met the pieman at the fair, Simple Simon learned

his name was Peeping Tom.

"I only feed my dog athletes on steroids."

Fearguth's Rules of Order #2

Always insist that the monkey gives your ball back.