"I'm Franklin Foer, editor of The New Republic. My boss

pays me to express opinions, like this one: 'The liberal

blogosphere are a group of people who feel incredibly

disenfranchised. They feel their country's been hijacked

and they're essentially powerless and the only way to

stop it is to scream as loudly as you can'. By contrast, as

one of the country's hijackers, I feel incredibly enfranchised

and powerful. That's why I'm whispering right now."

Tour De Pinocchios Intersects Tour de France

President Bush Reaches Out to Swells at Fort Braggart

Secretary Rice Greets Charlie Chaplin Impersonator

After a hard night of heavy breeding, the

Siberian tiger was just about pooped.

Said Japan's UN Ambassador Kenzo Oshima,

"North Korea, you make me sad."

"In just a few more days, they're not going

to have me to kick around anymore!"

This is a picture of animal rights activists in

Spain protesting the 'running of the bulls'.

They are all stripped to their underpants.

Use your imagination.

How to Entertain Your Kids #1

1. Obtain a video of the winner of the

hotdog-eating contest eating hotdogs.

2. Tell your kids the video shows how

hotdogs are made.

3. Play the video in reverse.
4. Observe your kids glued to the TV,

screaming "Gross!" with delight.

All Honest Abe could do was hang his head

when photographed between the President

of Georgia and the President of the U. S.

Ed Morrissey, Proprietor of

Captain's Quarters, Unmasked

Gray Lady, But Not the New York Times

"Hey, put me down, Buster! It's July 5th already!"

Some people wave flags.

Some people wear flags.

Some people are flags.

Is this fellow a raving lunatic, a soccer player,

or both?

Having devoured 53.75 hot dogs

to win the eating contest, Takeru

Kobayashi was now ready for a

bite of dessert.

Iranian Uranium Enricher

Eight hundred years after Genghis Khan founded

Mongolia, his descendants have to wait in long

queues to get fresh water. Now that's progress.

Oswald Boateng Bespeaks His 'Bespoke' Brand of Fashion

Full Moon Over Wimbledon

Nattily-Dressed Protester Tries

to Ignite Banner; Succeeds Only

in Scorching Hair

Though she and her husband are one of the most

popular comedy teams in the Netherlands, Queen

Beatrix doesn't measure up to the standard set

by Gracie Allen.

This picture is an apt metaphor for what the

4th of July should be all about: our unending

struggle to break the bonds that keep us from

realizing our humane potential.

Is there any doubt our ancestors descended

from the trees?

While the sun blazed, the boy answered the call

of the River Yangtze.

FYI

The Grim Reaper does make house calls.

Moscow Hairworld is setting the pace

in over-the-top coiffures.

In the race to space, the gopher tortoise was

gradually catching up with the Space Shuttle.

Radek Stepanek Plays 'Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy'

on Raquet Flute

Turnout was light at the political rally for the

Democratic Party of Albanians.

Will the bicycle replace the automobile in

the traffic jams of the future?

Ukrainian Marines Perform Cherokee Stomp Dance

Richard Scrushy's conviction on government

corruption charges has finally wiped that

putrid, self-righteous smile off his face.

All the color drained from John Yoo's

face when he heard the Supreme Court's

decision in Hamdan v. Rumsfeld.

Gold and diamonds were meaningless luxuries to the

old man. Youth, on the other hand, was a luxury he

desired but couldn't afford.

There's now a buyer's market for Brazilian flags

once owned by disappointed soccer fans.

Little Boy Unimpressed by Alexander

Menshikov and Peter the Great

Animal Rights Activists Prepare for 'Running of

the Nudes' in Pamplona, Spain

Afghanistan's Version of the World Cup

On your next trip to New Orleans, be sure to visit

the FEMA National Monument.

Oil Wrestler Gives Himself a Lube Job

There's hardly an ailment that a sharp kick to

the side of the head won't cure.

Lee Siegel Just Before He Hurled Himself Into

the Bonfire of the Inanities

The Pentagon's new 'bomb resistant vehicle' comes

equipped with an XBox 360 video game console, a

Philips DVD player, and a one-year pass to Netflix.

When George W. Bush, the best known Lincoln

impersonator in the world, didn't show up, the

other members of the guild almost called off

their annual convention.

When Jim Flaherty, Canada's Minister of Finance,

starts looking like this, you know you've had a tad

too much wine.

When Maria Sharapova serves, her opponents

are the ones who kiss the ring.

This missionary organization distributes Bibles

with 'Jesus Loves Porn Stars' printed on the cover.

"Yumpin' Yiminy Cricket!"

Why England Lost to Portugal in the

World Cup Quarterfinals