"Burn her, I say, she turned me into a newt!"

Hillary's M.O. Revealed for Winning the Hearts of White Voters

EPA Chief Stephen Johnson skipped a Senate

hearing today, claiming he has "back problems."

It seems somebody has stolen his spine.

Michelle Malkin, Jesse's Bitter Half

Bronze Man Challenges Iron Man to Heavy Metal Death Match

Clinton Supporter's Adamantine Resolve Begins to Soften

World's Worst Jobs #79

Indian Oil Refinery Gas Flares

Upon learning that his kind was treated with more respect there

than human beings, the iguana decided to immigrate to Gitmo.

Hillary Loses Nomination Battle, Wins Rocket Man

Consolation Prize

Razing McCain #3

Presidential Candidate Diagnosed with Two Incurable Maladies:

Stone in the Heart and Ossification of the Head

World's Worst Yobs #33

Max Boot

Scott Bloch, Chief of DOJ's Office of Special

Counsel, Target of FBI Investigation for Disk

Laundering and Towel Day Extravagancy

Madonna and Child

Blackwater President Gary Jackson Excited About

New 'Private Mercenary Army' Ringtone

On the outside: Michael Gordon, a New York Times reporter.

On the inside: an anonymous Bush Administration official.

Even though his office is "rife with booze, profanity,

inappropriate sexual activity, misuse of state vehicles,

and on-the-job threats involving the Mafia," Ohio

Attorney General Marc Dann says, "I am in the office,

have rolled up my sleeves, and am working on behalf

of the people of State of Ohio." Sounds like he's the

typical workaholic.

Careful! If you stare at President Bush when he doesn't

want you to, he'll call you a 'lookist'.

Razing McCain #2

Orthodox: 'Ortho'=Straight, 'Dox'=Talk

World's Worst Jobs #78

Afghan Flour Market Worker

Before the Wright Brothers, there were the Wrong Brothers.

Thrilla in Manila 2: The Revenge of Allah

With a price tag of over $600 million, the U. S. Embassy

in Baghdad has given new meaning to 'Green Zone'.

In Afghanistan, the Gerber slogan is: "Anything for baby,

so long as it's rice."

Tragic Mask
Comic Mask

Tragicomic Mask

Razing McCain #1

Don't listen to what John McCain says today.

Listen to what he says tomorrow about what

he meant to say today.

"Whaddya mean, 'Take it slower, Dear'? If I take it any slower,

I'll get a ticket for being double-parked!"

Surge in Shark Attacks Blamed on Sherman's Lagoon,

Says Shark Expert

Rupert Murdoch's Favorite Lap Dancer

Freedom's Watch

Distinguished Rooster Reputed to Possess World's

Largest Repertoire of Cock Jokes

At age 82, Hugh Hefner is the oldest man ever elected to be

the Mayor of Hooterville.

Work on Baghdad's Rumsfeld Memorial was slowed today

when U. S. rockets landed near the al-Sadr hospital,

wounding twenty people including women and children,

and incinerating or damaging eleven ambulances.

Secretary Gates Shellshocked by 'Bombs Bursting in Air' Necktie

Nearsighted Woman Reading Love Letter in the Sand

Thug the Pygmy Hippo was known far and wide for

his bright, beautiful, healthy, Colgate Smile.

Houston homebuilder Bob Perry bought the Texas Supreme

Court today, only to discover he already owned one.

Don Young Delivering His Famous 'Sometimes I

Feel Like a Coconut' Speech

Hunt for More Dungeons at 'Cheney's House of Horror'

Senators Clinton and McCain Join Forces to Oppose

Increase in Windfall Pandering Tax

"Yeah, I've been a big Taj Mahal fan for as

long as I can remember."

"Are you the Status Crow everybody is talking about?"

Drudgery Report #5
Styling Ann Althouse's hair would be drudgery.

Famous Blogger "Neither Ace Nor Spade," Research Shows

The Unexpurgated Bible #14

"And the LORD said unto Moses, 'Yet will I bring an eleventh

plague upon Egypt, a plague of pigeons. And they shall cover

the face of the earth, that one cannot be able to see the earth'."

This would be the last time the old man asked a policeman

for help crossing the street.

Stopped for speeding, the driver of the Straight Talk Express said

he was trying to put some distance between John McCain and the

most unpopular President in modern American history.

American Empire #21

Message Force Multiplier

Is it May Day, or is it a Laugh-In re-run?