Mr. USA had finally gotten his fill of the

Petraeus and Crocker Show.

Ryan Crocker, U. S. Ambassador to Iraq, doesn't spend

much time outdoors in sunny Baghdad, where the

temperature climbs to 130 degrees in the summer. Instead,

he spends most of his time keeping cool in the Paleface Zone.

"No, Congressman, Ambassador Crocker isn't grieving over

3,774 American soldiers killed in Iraq. He is just trying to

get over the fact that Halliburton's stock is still 35 percent

below its high of $54.69 on Sept. 6, 2000, just weeks after

Dick Cheney left his post as CEO to campaign to become the

nation's Vice President."

Predictably, Ambassador Crocker's testimony before

Congress rendered the cat comatose.