Saturday, June 15, 2013

Two-Minute Haters #34
Joey Heck
Adventures in Lexicology #9
Teabaggie, n.  A Teabagger with a degree from
Texas A&M.  [Rick Perry is the #1 Teabaggie
in Texas.]
According to a new Census Bureau report, 12,000 
more Sarah Palin-like 'white Americans' died than 
were born between July 1, 2011 and July 1, 2012.
And now for the bad news . . .
Schoolchildren in Texas can now legally wear Santa Claus
suits and say 'Merry Christmas' anytime they
goddam please.

Friday, June 14, 2013

A Good Question, Even If You Don't Have Cats

Thursday, June 13, 2013

Bipartisan Ship Runs Aground in Sea of Frozen Ideologies
Rupert Murdoch Interviewing Applicants to Be His
Fourth Wife, Says He's Looking for a Hottie
with Advanced Cream-Pie Deflecting Skills
Bill Clinton Says Obama Risks Looking Like a 'Wuss' 
and 'Total Fool' for Not Getting Extramarital Blowjobs
Wendy's Softserv Mainliner
Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #503
Jeff Duncan
“I have a high level of confidence that NSA surveillance 
is used to protect us and I know that it has been successful 
in preventing terrorism.”
"Ahh, ahh, spooky, mmm, spooky, ahh, ahh, ahh,
 spooky, ooh, spooky
Ahh, aah, aah, spooky!"
Trent Franks Drops Akin Turd in
Arizona Shitter
Jakarta Children Allowed to Exist on Condition
 of Anonymity
Why are we not surprised to learn that Jeff Flake, 
one of America's most unpopular Senators, 
has a racist and homophobic son?

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Edward Snowden Causes Ted Cruz's Libertarian
Persona to Split from His Conservative Persona
Bad Spellers of the World, UNTIE! #140

Tuesday, June 11, 2013

Whistler's Mother

Predator's Mother
Can't you sleep better at night knowing the FISA Court
is the last bastion standing between you and tyranny?
Hey, it has rejected .03% of all government surveillance
requests!  What more could you want?
Charlie Brown Put on a Brave
Face When He Learned That
Snoopy Had Become the Mascot
for the NSA
Snoopy Trying to Decide
Whether Becoming the
Mascot of the NSA Was
a Good or Bad Idea
Stuart Smalley Sez:  "The Fourth Amendment to the
Constitution?  Fuck it!  I'm having a personal crisis."
Regardless of the ultimate outcome of Ed Snowden's
whistleblowing, something very useful  has already 
happened:  ideological 'bright lines' have been blown to
smithereens, with liberals finding themselves allied with 
conservatives, and vice versa.  When was the last time
you heard Michael Savage ranting against Fox News,
and Dianne Feinstein and John Boehner singing
'Treasonous Traitor' in two-party harmony?  Now
we can more clearly see where the ideological
'bright lines' are really drawn.
Clappertron to Be Centerpiece of New Secret 
NSA Utah Data Center
Al Franken Sez:  “I can assure you, this is not about
 spying on the American people.”
['Spying' once meant 'secretly collecting 
information'.  Now that we know what
the NSA is doing, it's no longer 'secret'
and is therefore no longer 'spying'.]
When there's only one passenger left in the elevator, as is
usually the case when Ted Cruz steps aboard, it's easy to
tell who broke wind.
"Crest Pro-Health makes my mouth feel 
brighter, fresher, cleaner."
Coming Soon to a Theatre Near You #84
Watchers V: the NSA Is Off the Leash
President Obama wants you to know how much he 
enjoys reading your email.
No user-serviceable parts inside.

Monday, June 10, 2013

"Sécurité nationale, c'est moi."
The Day Little Johnny Got His Hands on 
Dad's XXX-Ray Machine
Warm Scuzzies #401
Booz Allen Hamilton
Big Bro
You know President Obama has come down on the 
wrong side of the issue when Hugh Hewitt, the Wall 
Street Journal, Andrew McCarthy, John Hinderaker, 
Mark Steyn, Ramesh Ponnuru, and John Yoo join 
him in defending the NSA's domestic surveillance

Sunday, June 09, 2013

Little Known Fact #38
Erick Erickson uses a photo of smooching lesbians as
wallpaper on his laptop.
Erick Erickson Sez:  “When you look at biology, look 
at the natural world, the roles of a male and a 
female in society, and other animals, the male 
typically is the dominant role.”
[Maybe providing a path to citizenship for 
immigrants, like Erick (from Planet of the Apes),
wasn't such a good idea after all.]