Saturday, February 10, 2018

Dweebs, Dorks, and Doofuses #109
John Moody
New White Supremacists Recruiting Poster
"Lazy Mexicans are going to steal your jobs!" 
Kelly exclaimed paradoxically.
Jeremy Bentham Sez: "Tyranny and anarchy are never
 far apart."
Stacey Dash: 23 Years Later and Still Clueless
For some reason,  no little boy has ever crawled
inside this claw machine.
Jim Hoft: "I'm being Shadow-Banned."
Interlocutor: "Don't you mean Ray-Banned?"
Jim Hoft: "Um, yeah, that too."
Syrian Man Having Damascus Road Experience
The Leaning Tower of Taiwan, Popular New Far Eastern
 Tourist Attraction
Man in Charge of Washing GOP Mascot Says
Trump Stains Will Never Come Out
World's Worst Yoobs #191
Marlene Jaeckel
"Now consider how great The Patriarch was, unto whom 
even Abraham gave the tenth of the spoils."
The Potrzebie Prize #30
Mike Pence Congratulated for His Ass-Bound 
Snub of the Whole Concept of the Olympic Games

Friday, February 09, 2018

Have you tried the 'Special Pence Edition' of 
Smucker's Smarmalade?
Breaking with Tradition, Trump Skips Written Daily 
Intelligence Reports, Relies on Watching 'Fox & Friends'
"Hey, Stan, where's Oliver?"

Thursday, February 08, 2018

EPA's Scott Pruitt Suggests Hellfire and Brimstone 
May Not Be a 'Bad Thing' For Humans
Imagine what the Nazi book burners could have achieved 
if they, like Dana Loesch, had had butane lighters.
"Hey, guys, have you seen Dana Loesch?"

"We Nazis are only here to burn books.  She's with the 
NRA group burning the New York Times."
"I'm sitting in the Oval Office right now and I can
assure you there are no adults in the room.  Apparently,
they all left after Trump moved in."
"On January 26, 2018, the Dow Jones Industrial Average 
peaked at 26,216. By February 8, 2018, it had fallen to 
23,860. That's a drop of 2,356 points. Thanks, Obama."
House Republicans Adopt 'Safe-Space
Culture', Erect Wall to Protect GOP
Staffers from Democratic Contamination
Has the stock market joined the Vast Deep-State Conspiracy
against the Trump Administration?

Wednesday, February 07, 2018

Seventy-Six Sad Trombones Led the Big Parade
Trump Knows Best
Hope Hicks wasn't worried about being
in proximity to Rob Porter because he
only beat his wives.
When hot air rises, it expands.
Beyond Disbelief: John Kelly and Rob Porter
Warm Scuzzies #769
Oddie Shoupe
Trump's Bald Head Revealed as Wind Discomfits
World's Biggest Combover
John Kelly, Four-Star Couch Potato
Kim Trump-Un Calls for Giant Military Parade
The Book Hannah Arendt Would Write 
Were She Alive Today
When he allowed his head to float away,
Trump was clearly joking.

Tuesday, February 06, 2018

Remember the old color-coded Homeland Security
Advisory System? Well, it has been replaced with
the color-coded Trump Applause-O-Meter.
"If you don't give me the clap, you're a traitor!  Ha ha ha!"

Monday, February 05, 2018

Oxymorons for Our Time #190
Breitbart Editorial Standards
'Little Schiff', my ass!"
Stephen L. Miller's Day Job
Victorious Eagle Farting in Trump's General Direction
Defense Logistics Agency Loses Track of Hundreds of
Millions of Dollars in Humongous Couch Inside
 Levitating Pentagon
"I've made it from the bed to the couch.  There's no
stopping me now!"
ICE Nazis
Arthur Jones Decides Not to Run for Chancellor of
Nazi Germany, Opts to Run Unopposed for the 
GOP Nomination for Congress
Popular Super Bowl Ad
Midas Faces Backlash for Portraying
Jesus as Muffler Man in Super Bowl Ad

Sunday, February 04, 2018

Not Just Nunes's Memo Was a Dud
Trump Tweet Authenticated by Characteristic Spelling, 
Capitalization, Grammatical, and Syntactical Errors
Dweebs, Dorks, and Doofuses #108
Jacob Wohl
Nunes Memo 'Totally Truncates' Trump