Saturday, January 03, 2015

American Schutzstaffel #47
This big, it's called a 'Hellapeenya!'
Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #607
Don Barrington
Dancin' Dinesh

Dancin' Dude Doin' D'Souza
House Majority Whip Stars in
Remake of Hollywood Classic
Yes, there is scientific evidence that
Arthur Godfrey died from lung
cancer and emphysema.
In the Palin household, it's a dog's life indeed.
Cheetahs could run faster if they didn't take time out 
to convert miles to kilometers.
Was William Mattson arrested for sexual assault or 
for being a zombie?  Opinions differ.
Metaphor Mixology #6
The suffocating din of a brewing race scandal 
set alarm bells ringing off the hook.

Friday, January 02, 2015

Police Chief's Gun Misfires in Bed, Wife Now in Critical
 Condition; "Never Before Was a Nocturnal Emission
So Deadly," Observer Says
"We understand, Senator Reid, that Senator McConnell
is still in the hospital."
Even though the Cat Nebula is over 3,000
 light-years from Earth, it seems much closer.
One small step for Trig.  One giant
leap for Palinkind.
Think of John Boehner as the GOP's nicotine addiction, 
and something like scales will fall from your eyes.
"Honey, are the kids ready to go to Bullets and Burgers?"
When Harry Met Jungle Gym
When Muffler Man Ruled the Earth
Grand Old Party Limo the House Majority Whip
Brought from Louisiana as His 'Work Car'
"Feed us, Mama
Feed us all night long!"
I Remember Dubya #66
Looking deep into Putin's soul, Dubya discovered a
 fellow admirer of Zippy the Pinhead.

Thursday, January 01, 2015

Happy New Year to One and All!

Wednesday, December 31, 2014

"I've finally reconciled myself to the fact that I'll be
a Corgi for the rest of my life.  What about you?"
In his earlier New York Times bestseller, Liberal Fascism
Jonah Goldberg alerted us to the political dangers of 
liberalism.  But in his new book, Liberal Fashionistas,
he warns us of the artistic dangers, what's really
 waiting for us at the end of the runway of 
Aren't we all over Elisabeth Hasselbeck defending
Christianity in a red dress?  Seriously, when is she going
to realize we won't be over attacks against  Christianity
until she catches up with the latest fashion and starts 
wearing a blue dress?
Does anybody know how many followers you must have on 
Twitter before you can declare yourself the Messiah?
He had always gotten by with the help of his friends, 
and his friends had always gotten by with his.  At 
age 64, Rick Perry had the face he deserved.
"I'm sure you're just as relieved as I am that you didn't 
receive one of TPM's 'Worst Tweets of the Year Awards'."
This just in from the Twitter Machine:
"Viewed strictly as a threat to U. S. public
health, more people died from laughing at 
Chuck Johnson in 2014 than died from
The person most likely to be killed by a gun is the gun owner, 
through suicide.  So: is suicide when a good guy with a gun 
shoots a bad guy with a gun, or vice versa?
Over the past five years, the NYPD has settled 10,000
civil rights cases for $428 million.  Just imagine how many 
army surplus MRAPs it could have purchased with that
much money!
The Politico Illustrated #38
"The House majority whip has already gone into 
full damage-control mode."
The first Bobcat in 100 years on Jekyll Island is believed
to have once belonged to a Mr. Edward Hyde.
David Duke with Baggage

"I'm like David Duke without the baggage."
Jesus toast tastes better made from Wonder Bread.

Tuesday, December 30, 2014

Chattanooga Woman Points Loaded Gun at Cop, 
But Is Not Shot 6 Times, Because She Was 
the Wrong Color and Hadn't Stolen Any Cigars
Please be advised that the Louisiana congressman who
accidentally addressed a white supremacist conference
in 2002 is not the same guy who accidentally killed a
rare grey wolf in Utah in 2014.
Who does Sam Brownback remind you of?  Hopefully,
no one you know.
Clayton Morris, Fox News' donut sprinkler, fears he may
be laid off when the FDA's ban on trans fats goes into effect.
So, according to Alexander Waugh's new book, William 
Shakespeare was a sock puppet.   And the hand inside once 
belonged to Shari Lewis. Except that it wasn't really her 
hand but one of the hands of Orlac.  Except it had 
originally belonged to Vasseur the murderer . . .
Batrachia Grimmii Sez:  "The decision to quit was difficult, 
but it did not break my spirit."
Westboro Baptist Church Identifies Cause of AirAsia 
Plane Crash and Explains Why God Laughs
Michael Grimm.  Broken in half.  Like a boy.
'Candid Camera' used to be just a TV show.  
We all now live in it.
Coming Soon to a Theatre Near You #102
Son of Chucky:  Out of the Toy Box Again!
Rehabilitation and redemption of selfie sticks is possible.
1. Michael Grimm prays to God, asking Him whether
he should resign from Congress.
2.  Michael Grimm announces he will resign from
Congress, effective January 5.
3.  See, all you skeptics: God does answer prayers!
World's Worst Yobs #321
Jay Caruso