Wednesday, April 08, 2020

Most people don't know Narcissus was a missionary.

"If you're seeing things
Running through your head
Who you gonna call?
Fox News Cabinet!"
Even as a little boy, Donald Trump trashed
Little Lady Liberty.
When it's your turn to take out the trash,
dress appropriately.
The Coronavirus attacks your lungs.
The Pendejovirus attacks your brain.
"Honey, you really should get up off the couch
more often, because you're beginning to look
a lot like an Idaho potato."
No Bernie Man this year?  Sad!
His Inner Jesus kept asking him, "What have you done today 
to save the world?"
Captain on Allowing HMS Titanic Cruise Passengers to
 Disembark: ‘I’d rather have them stay on, personally.’
"Mom!  Johnny keeps changing the channel
to Romper Room!"
Smoking in the Time of Coronavirus
COVID-2020
Is it just me, or is Trump morphing into Quasimodo?
"‘Death is a welcomed friend’: Pastor Tony Spell calls on 
Christians to defy coronavirus lockdown — 
even if it kills them"
Move over, Dr. Fauci, Sean Hannity is in the house!

Tuesday, April 07, 2020

Back in the day, ventilators weren't as effective
 as those we have today, but you have to admit they 
were more entertaining.
Bad Actor
Another MST3K Musical Interlude
God moves in mysterious ways sometimes,
but sometimes he's pretty straightforward.
"Honey, it looks like our toilet paper 
order has arrived."
Kayleigh McEnany Flunks Field Sanity Test, Promoted to 
White House Press Secretary
What's the Matter with Wisconsin?
Trump's Daily COVID-19 Press Gaggle Added to List 
of 15 Surprising Things That Raise Your Blood Pressure
Did you know COVID-19 now has its own Twitter account and 
already has more followers than Donald Trump?
It's so apposite to celebrate a war which took the lives of 
620,000 soldiers in the middle of the COVID-19 epidemic.
Dose Up, Everybody!
Thomas Modly is what you get when you put a 
GODDAM INVESTMENT BANKER in charge 
of the Navy.
Remember 'featherbedding'?  That's when you
got paid for not working.
Thomas Modly Newest Member of the Trump
Administration's Olympic Caving Team
Breaks Old Record Held by Man Who Walked a Mile
for a Camel
The Gang of Five
What the world needs now more than ever is an
Alfred E. Einstein to devise a Grand Unified 
Conspiracy Theory.

Monday, April 06, 2020

Doctor Death
All Easter Merchandise Must Go!

Buy One Crucifix at Regular Price,
Get Two Free
Where Bad Grapes Go When They Die
When he wrote the lyrics of 'My Despicable Things', 
Thomas Modly was #1 on his list.
Waiting for Easter
Shhh!  If Trump hears this, he'll start bragging
about it.
Warm Scuzzies #916
Thomas Modly
Karma Is a Harsh Mistress
If you have to ask how much this book costs, 
you can't afford it.
We're Only in It for the Money
Peter Navarro Puts the Fear of the Lord
into COVID-19

Sunday, April 05, 2020

Jared Kushner's National Strategic Stockpile Designed as 
Safeguard Against Autocannibalistic Tendencies 
Epic Battle for the Stable Genius Crown
There Will Be a Lot of Death
Remember Brad Parscale?  He's so pre-coronavirus,
isn't he?
It's Cock Blocking Time!
Not only is 'President Cuomo' pronounced 'trippingly on
 the tongue', but---gasp!---he's only 62 years old. 
Somewhere On the Front Line in the War 
on COVID-19