Saturday, August 21, 2010

Sarah Palin Event Gets Downgraded From 2,923-Seat
Moran Theater To Venue Seating Only 609 Morans
Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #203
Major General James E. Chambers
Randroidism Strikes 1 in 5 Americans,
Laetrile Believed to Be Only Cure
"Is there any truth to the rumor, Mr. Douthat, that you
are returning to Harvard to seek a master's degree in
Advanced Obfuscation Techniques?"
"Governor Christie, did you hear that the price of
hog jowls has jumped to $4 a pound?"
Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #202
Tom Emmer
Retirement Age Raised to 100,
Social Security Saved

Friday, August 20, 2010

Great Pumpkin Throws Up After Hearing
for the Umpteenth Time How President
Obama Was Instrumental in Passing
the Stimulus Package
Remember this guy? No? Goodness gracious,
how quickly we forget our celebrity warriors!
John McCain would rather forget the day
he met the real Maverick.
There the ruin stood, the Tower of Geller, an artifact
from the time Yahweh confounded the speech of the
Bikini Blogger from Outer Shriekistan.
Turkish Prime Minister Has Bad Hairbrush Day
Believe it or not, being a leopard is hard work.
"Hey, we're only burning Korans to smoke moist and
tender pork ribs, one of the most venerable of our
Southern Christian Traditions."
"Two more, beertender!"
Ghastly Monsters and Blond Giants #111
Pamela Geller and Tom DeLay
A Portrait of the Agent Provocateur as a Young Skank
If Barack Obama is the Seed of Islam, Franklin
Graham is the Hayseed of Christianity.

Thursday, August 19, 2010

To the 1 in 5 Americans who believe Barack Obama
is a Muslim, you're mistaken. He's the Angel of Death
for the 1 in 5 Americans who believe he's a Muslim.
Bruce Carroll Reluctant to Change Blog Title from
'Gay Patriot' to 'Reagan's Rainbow Tie Coalition'
Bloodsport Blowback
Quite likely, you've never heard of Leonard Peikoff. He
is probably America's oldest Objectivist philosopher,
and, at age 76, is still randy for Ayn. You have to give
him credit for that---if for nothing else.
As his mother measured his height for
the Guinness Book of World Records,
Leonid Stasnyk reflected on Descartes'
two-substances solution to the mind-
body problem.
Drink Responsibly,
Like Newt,

Think Irresponsibly
"See! Even my palms are hairless!"
As a general rule, avoid those who frequently use
the word, 'nefarious'. They're probably wingnuts
from Loserville who have a predilection for arcane
video games.
Rude Rhymes #22

Human Stain

John McCain
Honky-Talk Woman
Oxymorons for Our Time #56
Magical Thinking
Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #201
Jeremy Walters
"Study Claims Cougars Don't Exist -- and Cougars Beg to Differ"
"The last American combat troops have left Iraq.
I think President George W. Bush deserves some
credit for our cutting and running."
When the Ring-Tailed Lemur was asked, "Are you
an Objectivist?" all it did was stare in disbelief.
One in Five Americans Think Obama Is Muslim and Can't
Find Their Asses with Both Hands, a Flashlight, and a Map
Joe Farah Steals Tom
Friedman's Pornstache
Coward Dean
Taiwanese Corporation Adds New Feature to Its
Manufacturing Plants---Suicide Nets to Catch
Jumping Employees
'Operation Iraqi Freedom' Ends, 'Operation
Unending Occupation' Begins

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Airline to Start Charging Extra for Planes to Land
NeoHomocons, PaleoHomocons, and CrazyHomocons
Gather to Hear Ann Coulter Perform 'Snooky Ookums'
Rude Rhymes #21

Unsightly Crock

Rupert Murdoch
"I'm quitting my radio show so that I can regain my
First Amendment right to say the N-word as many
times as I wish."
Patrick Gray Sharp will soon be forgotten, but
something he said should be remembered:
"I love guns more than toothpaste!"

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

"Check out these lips, Angelina!"
"What do you think, soldier?"

"I don't have to think.
I have plenty of ammo."
"In my opinion, the Serpent was the hero in the
Garden of Eden, not the villain."
Fearguth's Rules of Order #42
If you've never picked a seal's nose,
don't start now.