Saturday, August 05, 2017

"Deep State scarier than Creature from Black Lagoon."
Pee-Wee Hermann Göring Being Considered
as White House Communications Director
Vladimir Putin, Fisher of Men
"If you'll show me your Pence, I'll show you my Koch."
Supporters of Trump's wall are now saying the wall is
just a metaphor for border security.  If so, it will be
the World's Longest Metaphor.
Q: "Do I look like someone who would send out unsolicited
dick pics?"
A: "You work for Fox News, don't you?"

Friday, August 04, 2017

Dinesh D'Ooza
Two Scumlords Start the Day by Breaking the Law
Inside the White House
Dinesh D'Souza Presents a Copy of His Prison Memoir
to Sebastian Gorka in the White House
"If I were you, honey, I wouldn't try to substitute Friskies
for Fancy Feast again."
Live Life Comfortably®
Big Bigots, Little Bigots #108
Gavin McInnes
Deep State Courier Service Target of DOJ Probe of 
White House Leaks
The Trump Crime Family should
keep in mind that Bob Mueller
will be reading this book, too.

Thursday, August 03, 2017

Governor Jim Justice Announces Switch from Democratic
Party to Republican Party and Decision to Switch Clothiers
from Goodwill to Salvation Army
Trump Decides It's Time to Rebrand
With an approval rating of 33%, Trump is now dipping 
down into the meth chefs, oxy railers, glue sniffers, and
 paint huffers in the GOP base.
"When you've worked out as much as I have over the past 
six months, you'd take a 17-day vacation, too."
Natalia Veselnitskaya was getting better at flashing
the Sign of the Three-Eared Sphincter, but she still
hadn't perfected it.
Boy oh boy was Andrew Breitbart surprised when he 
was reincarnated as Nancy Pelosi's evil twin.
There Were Giants in the Earth in Those Days
"Like Trump, I think the White House is a dump!"

Wednesday, August 02, 2017

Have you wondered whatever happened to Screech 
from Saved by the Bell?
Even Eric Bolling of Fox News says of Stephen Miller, 
"Don’t put that guy in front of the cameras again."
Gosh, that was fast! They've already made a movie 
about Trump's anti-immigrant legislation.
Render Unto Caesar the Things That Are Caesar's
"I was just joking."
"What happened to him?"
"He made the mistake of trying to read Newt
Gingrich's Understanding Trump."
Neolithic Swiss Army Knife

Tuesday, August 01, 2017

"Stop calling me a scaredy-cat! Can't you
see I'm a dog?"
When the recent survivor of a 'zipper job' was asked 
if he wished to watch 'Survivor White House', he said, 
"Please don't make me laugh, or I may split a seam!"
"The annoying expression you're thinking of is 'On Fleek',
not 'On Flake'."

Monday, July 31, 2017

"Hey, you, stop gawking at Omarosa's stunt breasts!"
Whack-a-Mooch!
On the same day Scaramucci got whacked, David Marcus
and The Federalist gave the Mooch a smooch.
The Whacking of the Mooch
Chris Christie Consumes Kilo of Ballpark Nachos in
Front of Cubs Fan

Sunday, July 30, 2017

Dweebs, Dorks, and Doofuses #98
Bill Cunningham
Things That Make Your Skin Crawl #13
Arthur Schwartz Tweeting on Behalf of 
Anthony Scaramucci
A Maakies Definition of Trump: "A Seething Meatball
of Hatred and Jealousy, Marbled with Rich Veins of
Inadequacy"
"What I like best about Kellyanne is she shows me 
proper deference and humility and never calls me
Ronald, my first name."