Saturday, May 09, 2020

Trump Says National Stockpile of  Wartime Metaphors 
Running Dangerously Low
The red arrow points to Katie Miller, Mike Pence's
press secretary and Stephen Miller's wife.  This picture
was taken on Thursday, May 7.  On Friday, May 8, Ms. 
Miller was diagnosed with COVID-19.
The coronavirus is loose in the White House.
"Just like me, they long to be
Close to you."
Remember the mask worn by The Sphincter, the 
tight-assed superhero?  Brad Parscale does.
There's widespread agreement that Brad Parscale,
Trump's campaign manager, looks better in a 
Auto-Euthanasia Finds Its Voice

Hydroxychloroquine Action Day!

Friday, May 08, 2020

Glute Brute
Jeff Sessions Sez:  “I stood up for the truth and 
performed at the highest levels."
Warm Scuzzies #923
Jackie Johnson
Build the Wall Taller and Paint It Black
Keep Your Arms and Legs Inside Your Car
at All Times!
Crazy Uncle Ted #1
You've seen PLANDEMIC A.  Wait until you see
Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #810
Judy Mikowitz
'Ted Cruz Gets Haircut at Salon A La Mode After 
Owner Shelley Luther Released from Jail'
[©Photo Ops Я Us]
Larry Kudlow Sez:  “After all, the unemployment rate 
stood at a 50-year low of 3.5 percent only two months ago.”
[It now stands at 14.7%.]
Ice Capade
America, America, God Shed His Grace on Thee
World's Worst Yoobs #212
Patience Roggensack
Gregory McMichael and Travis McMichael,
father and son, are spitting images of each other,
with emphasis on the spitting.  Also, cold-blooded

Thursday, May 07, 2020

Remember when The Penguins crushed with
'Earth Angel'?
"While you're at it, you may as well pick up some
TYLENOL® PM Extra Strength Liquid and 1000 
Rounds of Wolf 123gr FMJ 7.62x39mm Ammo."
Maxwell Smart and the Chief Dining in the Time of 
State Representative Nino Vitale (R-OH) refuses to wear
a mask because he was made in the image of God and God
doesn't wear a mask.
Waiting foe the Holy Ghost
If Trump Is Forced to Self-Quarantine
Server Apparently Got Too Close to 
White House Resident
He's 80-years-old and he believes he's 'divinely inspired'
to sell Silver Solution to the masses.  He's Jim Bakker
and he's getting closer to the day he'll join Tammy Faye
in Paradise.
How Jacob Wohl Charms Women, like Diana Andrade,
 to Lie for Money
Bay of Pigs Invasion Re-Enactors Blame
Faulty GPS Mapping for So-Called
'Venezuelan Coup Attempt'
Plan B calls for the wall to be painted orange
with black polka dots.
Sarah Palin Shows Up in Dallas to Conduct a Workshop 
on Social Distancing for Hairdressers

Wednesday, May 06, 2020

Warm Scuzzies #922
On the Road Back to Normalcy
Luther Nails 95 Theses to A La Mode 
Salon Door, Re-Ignites Protestant 
The good news is the Gull Shark's favorite food is 
Murder Hornets.
Her:  "The sink is full of dirty dishes. When are you going
 to wash them?"
Him:  "I never wash dishes during a thunderstorm."
Her:  "But's there's not a cloud in the sky!"
Him:  "That's true, but I'm not taking any chances."
"What's up with him?"
"He says he's infowhelmed."
Caravaggio's The Supper at Emmaus [Updated]
One minute, Trump says the coronavirus task force
is winding down.  The next, he says it will continue
on indefinitely.  To understand what's going on
 from moment to moment, you must wear
 protective Vacillation Glasses, as he does.
Why Is Everybody Laughing?
Has the Trump 2020 Campaign Cortege visited
your town yet?
Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi Memorabilia Closeout
All Sales Are Final!
Accordion Shortage Sends Shock Waves
Through Global Polka Chain

Tuesday, May 05, 2020

Governor Jim Justice, the Lumbering Lardass of West 
Virginia, told businesses to “fucking follow the guidelines,” 
but later denied dropping the F-bomb, blaming the 
alliteration on an “goddam glitch.”
And Wuhan ate the dog.
One of These Things Is Not Like the Others
Swine Are Immune
Charles Bronson Was a Pussy