Saturday, January 27, 2007

If you missed the first official Porn and Pancakes event on
December 2, 2006 at Ada Bible Church in Grand Rapids,
Michigan (attended by over 540 men), the next PAP event
is scheduled for the Living Word Church in Ontario,
New York, on February 10, 2007. You can buy your tickets
online for $8, which includes all the pancakes you can
eat and all the porn you can battle.
Will history remember Valerie Plame Wilson as
the pawn that checkmated a king?
One month after Peacey was released in Assisi, Italy,

it was bagged in western Pennsylvania by Dick Cheney.
Come September, Manuel 'Pineapple Face' Noriega,
former dictator of Panama, will be released from a
U. S. prison after serving 17 years of a 30-year sentence.
His lawyer says Noriega plans to submit his resume to
several countries in need of a dictator, including Iraq.
The hardest part of Vladimir Putin's bilateral
talks with India was coping with the cuisine,
which made him gag reflexively.
Rafael Nadal claims sniffing his left armpit gets him
higher than smoking a big spliff.
“Condoms don’t belong in school, and neither does Al Gore,"
says Frosty Hardison. "He’s not a schoolteacher. The
 information that’s being presented in An Inconvenient Truth
is a very cockeyed view of what the truth is. The Bible says 
that in the end times everything will burn up, not just get warm.”
How Bipartisanship Works in Boxing

In Soccer

In Politics

Famous Dummy Greets David and Victoria Beckham
Andy Roddick has one of those new cell-phone-enabled
tennis rackets.

Friday, January 26, 2007

"I didn't want to give Ari Fleischer immunity," says Patrick Fitzgerald.
"I did so reluctantly. I was buying a pig in a poke." Pig in a poke?
Doesn't this sound like the Special Prosecutor is anti-Semitic?
Somebody needs to notify Abe Foxman immediately!
Charles Johnson, the proprietor of Little Green Footballs,
lives in the world of black-and-white. So, what does 'green'
mean to him? "Just dollars," he says. "I'm colorblind."
You are looking into the eyes of a Cosmophasis umbratica,
better known as a 'jumping spider'. Oh, don't worry, it only
jumps when something looks into its eyes.
Michele Bachmann, Republican Representative from
Minnesota, Teaching President Bush How Evangelical
Lutherans Suck Face
"Knob job, sir? Two for the price of one, this week
only. But please, no grocery coupons."
Matt Drudge at Work

Matt Drudge at Home
Girl Looking Down the Wrong End of the Barrel
The Brothers Grim
"In that I'm the decision-maker, I had to come up with a way
forward that precluded disaster. So the first step is for all
Americans to raise their hands and make a triangle, like this."
Where's Waldo?
Skater Gets Confused, Admits He Can't Tell
His Partner's Ass from Her Elbow

Thursday, January 25, 2007

At last, the good guys in white hats began to
push back against the bad guys in black hats.

The Statue of Liberty's 'Inner M'

The Vice President's 'Inner M'

The President's 'Inner M'

M&M's 'Inner M'
General David Petraeus Confirmed; Will Attempt
to Counter Insurgency in United States Senate
"As my good friend, Joe Lieberman, will attest, it is not true
I tell six lies before breakfast. It's twelve lies before lunch."
Would someone please tell Republican Representative
Michele Bachmann that Gael Monfils is ready when she is?
Donald Rumsfeld has landed a new job as a professional
Coin-Toss Caller. His salary will consist of those coins
that land neither heads nor tails.
CNN's Right-Foot Man, Glenn Beck.
"Bottom line is that we've had enormous successes in Iraq
and we will continue to have enormous successes. By the way,
have I ever shown you the Congressional Medal of Honor I
received for leading the United States to victory in the
Vietnam War?"
BushCult Bloggers Line Up to Sign the NRSC Pledge
The Latest in Haute Couture: the
iPhone Surround Evening Gown

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

It slowly began to dawn on the duck that it wasn't
the star of Easy Rider II, as had been promised.
"It's called 'pushups', soldier, not 'pushdowns'!"
"Thanks for the invitation, Mr. President, but this is
neither the time nor the place for Indian wrestling."
Republican Representative Michele Bachmann was
still in a dreamy mood today after her thirty seconds
of face time with President Bush following his State
of the Union address last night. Michele says she won't
wash her lips for a week and expects the autograph
she got from the President to sell for big bucks on
eBay someday.
Senator John Warner Finally Bails from the
President's Kamikaze Mission in Iraq
Kids really get a kick out of the new interactive Jello.
Chinese kindergarteners are so lucky. They get to sit
around a campfire in the middle of the classroom.

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Everyone was shocked to see that Barney had finally
succumbed to Bush Derangement Syndrome.
If flowers, the sexual organs of plants, mirrored human behavior,
would they give each other, on special occasions, bouquets
of penises and vaginas?
In one of the world's most exotic suicide parlors, you can
sit in a tub and wait while a school of tiny carnivorous
fish gradually eat you from head to toe. This method is
admittedly very slow, but it is said to be faster than
smoking cigarettes.
Fashion Butterflies
Brahma Bull at the Annual Human Taming Festival