Thursday, December 31, 2009

It was New Year's Eve, and the natives were restless.
The Dark Kristol
Has anybody heard if the bloggers over yonder at RedState
still believe that "Tonight... We Are All Rush Limbaugh"?
Can you think of a better way to celebrate the
last morning of 2009 than eating a Country
Breakfast Parfait?
"I'm packed with protein and lots of wonderful
vitamins and minerals like iron and zinc. Yum!"
Rush Limbaugh Sharply Criticized by Kevin Madden for
Having Chest Pains in Same 'Foreign Place' Where
President Obama Vacations
Rush Limbaugh 'Resting Comfortably' at Honolulu Hospital,
Says Medication for Back Pain 'Really Swell'
Rush Limbaugh Taken to Honolulu Hospital After Acute
Attack of Adhesive Capsulitis (Frozen Shoulder Syndrome)

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Latest Innovation in Airport Security
Designed to Foil Crotch Bombers
Five-Megaton Shoe Bomb
Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #118
Mike Conaway
Once again, they found themselves at loggerheads
over the issue of who would do the billing and
who would do the cooing.
Oxymorons for Our Time #21
Libertarian Conservative
World's Worst Yoobs #62
Anne Kornblut
Tiger Woods' Wayward Pecker Cost Billions in Stock Market

Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Fearguth's Rules of Order #40
Always dress appropriately when
undergoing an Airport Body Scan.
When she heard that Karl Rove was
divorced, Rowdy Girl was glad the
playing field had finally been leveled.
"I'd better strike while the irony is hot,"
she thought.
Learn Pig Latin in Just 10 Days!
100% Guaranteed!
Speak in 10 Days or
You Don't Pay!
Rush Limbaugh Reminds Karl Rove That He's Still
One Marriage and One Divorce Behind Him in the
Family Values Sweepstakes
Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab: even his name struck
terror into the hearts of pisspant Rightists.
"Doctor, my brain hurts!"
Ship of Teeninsy Fools
Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #117
Jack Cashill
Warm Scuzzies #48
Gregory Meeks
"Ooo, ooo, ooo, so Pete loved Sir Allen the Ponzi Schemer,
eh? Sounds to me like he's another Cheetah!"

Monday, December 28, 2009

She had to go all the way to Casablanca to
find him, but Michelle Malkin finally found
the perfect webmaster for Hot Air and all
its gaseous asses.
Adventures in Lexicology #2
Escalatio ('eskəl'eɪʃioʊ), n. 'Going down' on (or 'giving head' to)
the Military-Industrial Complex. Escalatio is also commonly
referred to as 'Sucking Dick Cheney'. [After months of careful
deliberation, the Obama Administration decided to perform
escalatio in the Afghanistan War.]
As you can see, everything is 'off the table' at the moment.
But tomorrow, everything may be back 'on the table'. You
just never know.
Republicans Poised to Begin 'Repeal 20th-Century Campaign'
in 2010; 'Repeal 19th-Century Campaign' Deferred Until 2012
Rightbloggers and Other
Internet Biohazards #28
Be John Galt
"You've heard of the Philosophy of the Open Hand,
haven't you? Well, to hell with that pantywaist
perspective! I'm a champion of the Philosophy of
the Clenched Fist, and don't you ever forget it!"
"Airline officials say in-flight security rules have been eased
after a two-day clampdown. At the captain's discretion,
passengers can once again wear clothing and move about
the cabin during the flight."
This looks like a job for . . . Racket Squad!
Gael Monfils Reacting to 'The JFK Photo That Could
Have Changed History'
Warm Scuzzies #47
Pete Sessions
Wanted: Workers for 2010 Meerkat Census

Sunday, December 27, 2009

If you are staring at Medusa's face, you are now
turning into stone. But if you are staring at her tits,
you remain what you were to begin with: a typical
guy with an oral fixation.
"At this point in my life, I really don't give a
flying fig what you think about my chin! I'm
just glad I still have one. And maybe, just
maybe, you'll be as lucky as I am when you
are 64."
As expected, only one of Michael
Jackson's Crystal Shoes was
found by the side of the road.
The whereabouts of its mate is
"Does size matter? Yes, but in exactly the
opposite way you are probably thinking
right now!"
Did you know that Senator Michael Enzi (R-WY) is
regarded by his Capitol Hill colleagues as the best
paper shuffler in the 111th Congress?
Michael Reagan Proving He Has a Bigger Mouth Than Either
Ronald Reagan or Jane Wyman, His Adoptive Parents
Salt-N-Pepa: the GOP Generation
Rightbloggers and Other
Internet Biohazards #27
Flopping Aces
Isn't it amazing how the simple expedient
of sucking in your gut changes the shape
of your nose and the length of your shorts?
The little Afghan felt that Onychophagia was the
least of his worries.
"But I don't want to be circumscribed!"
Entelechy of Species Homo Sapiens Revealed to Be
the Manufacture and Use of Firearms
New Food Sprinkle Makes It Easy to
Control Appetite and Over-Eating
Sarah Palin was jubilant when she learned that 'Death
Panels' had been named Politifact's Metaphor of the Year.