Saturday, June 29, 2013

Using a transurethral probe, federal investigators reportedly
 have found more undisclosed gifts stashed in Governor 
Bob McDonnell's enlarged prostate.
Glum and Abner
Tony Scalia Says Supreme Court's Gay Marriage
Decision Is 'Jaw-Dropping'
"Ya know, Bert, Clarence Thomas is 
just Tony Scalia's sockpuppet."
"I’m sad that Wendy Davis does not understand that 
every life is precious, so long as it stays in the womb."

Friday, June 28, 2013

Never Good, Often Bad, and Always Ugly
"Governor McDonnell, what time is it?"
"I refuse to answer that question on the grounds
that it might tend to incriminate me."
Rude Rhymes #63

Dick Sherry

Rick Perry
James Holmes to Be Screwed to Floor in Court

Thursday, June 27, 2013

Scientists Clone Rick Perry with One Drop of Bile
Warm Scuzzies #404
Braulio Castillo
Sam Alito Doing His Justice Taney Impression

Wednesday, June 26, 2013

Flag Desecration #66
"The only thing I hate more than Lunchables is
Nick Gillespie."
Louie Gohmert is a good example of what happens when 
a mother is forced to carry a brain-dead fetus to term.
Some people say this is the top of Mark Levin's bald head.  
Other people say it's the landing strip for ideas which he
receives from Outer Space.
"What Edward Snowden has revealed has caused 
irreversible and significant damage to me and all 
my allies who live in the dark and get a nut spying
on everybody else.” 
"You know, Dick, it boggles my mind how much misery
we will be able to inflict on the world over the next forty 
or fifty years.  Immortality!  What a concept!"
When he dies, Dick Cheney will not be cremated.  That's
because he's fireproof, made of pure asbestos.  
Antonin Scalia Demoted from Godfather
to Capo in Lou Costello Crime Family
Emperor Tiberius

Emperor Cruz
"Don't try to play me, homies!"
President Obama is happy that the Supreme Court has 
made it easier for the NSA to keep its eyes and ears
on more same-sex couples. 
Opponents of Same-Sex Marriage Now Begging and
Pleading for Political Asylum in Russia
Now that marriage is no longer defended by the federal 
government, Bryan Fischer may now be tempted
to divorce his wife and enter into a polygamous 
relationship with a whole host of gay, incestuous, 
and bestial men.  Such is the fruit of tyranny!
"Honey, your pet Hoverfly has been accessing your
stash again."
Fat Tony Elected to DC Hall of Tone-Deaf Ragers
Texas Celebrates Unconstitutionality of DOMA by 
Executing 500th Prison Inmate Since 1976
The Paula Deen Memorial Taco
"What does Texas do to ugly women?"
"It turns them into Republicans and
elects them to the Texas Legislature."
"What are all those people doing?"
"Can't you tell from just looking?
They're waiting in line outside
 Paula Deen's Savannah Kitchen."
Welcome to Greg's Abbottoir: 
Where Civil Rights Go to Die
If you're not a White Conservative
Republican, Texas Attorney-General 
Greg Abbott would prefer that you 
not vote.  But, if you ignore his 
preference and insist on voting
anyway, he will need to see your 
Voter ID.  Now, don't you start
comparing the Voter ID to the
Poll Tax, because that would
hurt Greg's feelings.
Governor Bob McDonnell (R-VA) has given political
whores a bad name by his willingness to barter the 
power of his office for a Rolex watch.  That's so
cheap!

Tuesday, June 25, 2013

Rude Rhymes #62

Bloated Mosquito

Sammy Alito
Contrary to what you've always believed about the 
reflectivity of white surfaces, a new study claims 
that you're 12% hotter in a plain white t-shirt.
The Politico Illustrated #31
"The Politico's role in the DC ecosystem"
Dweebs, Dorks, and Doofuses #27
Andrew Ross Sorkin
Don West learns the hard way that what the world needs
now is new and improved knock-knock jokes.
Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #506
Jodie Laubenberg

Monday, June 24, 2013

"The only human being who keeps me from
becoming a misanthrope is Dick Cheney.
He always restores my faith in humanity!"
"Not to worry, Michelle, these are only
crow's feet that frame our eyes---not
raven's feet, vulture's feet, or 
condor's feet."
MSNBC Institutes 7-Second Delay After Chuck Todd's Neck 
Kept Getting Fatter, Without Warning, Than His Head
Bad Spellers of the World, UNTIE! #141

Defecated Eschatology

While the revolution may or may not be televised, the end 
of the world will, without a doubt, be photographed.
Just as he did at the Bush Library dedication, former
Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi will be sleeping
 through his seven years in prison.
"Which way to Mississippi?  I
understand the legislature just
passed an open-carry law down
there."