Saturday, April 02, 2016

"He said if I didn't wear my hair this way, weasels would 
rip my flesh!"
“If I win, all of the bad things happening in the U.S. 
will be rapidly reversed!”
Clean your room!
Love, Mom
P. S. Burn the Trump poster!"
"I never drink . . . Coke."

Friday, April 01, 2016

Theatre of the Absurd
Alaskan Wind Turbine Blamed for Compos Mentis Genocide
"Cruzocch, Cruzocch, Cruzocch-i-o,
We'll find you if we have to go to Tok-y-o!"
"April Fools' Day Definitely a Hoax!" 
Attila the Bun Proclaims

Thursday, March 31, 2016

No matter how hard John Kasich tried, New Yorkers
never forgave him for eating pizza with a fork.
"As a child, my favorite cartoon character was 
Gerald McBoing-Boing, the noisemaking boy."
Bad Spellers of the World, UNTIE! #171

Wednesday, March 30, 2016

New Poll Shows Trump Has Deadbolt Lock on Hoser Vote
Tuscaloosa Baptists De-Deaconize Alabama Governor
"Don't throw out yesterday's inoperative GOP loyalty pledges!  
With the Pledge-O-Matic 2016, you can turn them into the 
campaign smoothies of tomorrow!"
Not Your Father's Pain in the Ass
If Donald Trump is threatening legal action, 
the sun must have risen in the east.
Oxymorons for Our Time #181
GOP Loyalty Pledge

Tuesday, March 29, 2016

"There’s a very well-coordinated national media campaign 
to backlash me for signing a law which allows businesses 
to provide separate but equal toilets and water fountains 
for heteros and homos." 
Glenn Beck Sez: "I have prayed about it and I happen to 
believe that Ted Cruz actually was anointed by God for 
this time."
Corey Lewandowski, Trump's Heydrich,
Arrested and Charged with Simple Battery
Big Bigots, Little Bigots #79
Bill Kintner
There's a right way and a wrong way to eat fried tarantulas.
Things to Avoid #31

Monday, March 28, 2016

Woo-Hoo Personals #12
Trumpborg Seeks Hook-Up with Wingnut Geek for 
Some Low-Speed Acoustic Coupling
When people are constipated,
they cannot function properly.
"Eeegah, I see fish and chips!"
Peter Cottontail probably won't be back next year.
Trump and Cruz had not heard the proverb,
'No One Wins When Clowns Fight'.
Guess who's in a jam in Bama?
Republicans Want Guns in Schools 
(Home of the Well-Educated) 
But Not at Their National Convention 
(Home of the Poorly-Educated)
Bad Spellers of the World, UNTIE! #170