Saturday, February 04, 2017

As Newt says to Ripley, "My mommy always said there were 
no monsters - no real ones - but there are."
'Trump's Likeness Found on Seized Heroin'
Trump Fumes
We Have Met the Enemy and 
He Is Trump
"Now this, my fellow Trumpniks, is my idea of a wall."
Bulk Bogan
Ivanka Helped Sink Trump Order on Gay Rights, 
But Still Having Trouble Making Her Legs Work
Billionaire Vincent Viola Withdraws as Trump’s Army 
Secretary Nominee So That He Can Spend More Time with 
His Money
"Why is it all you want to talk about is my eyes being 
closed and not my earrings?"
World's Worst Yobs #379
Jonathan Tobin
"So what if polls show 53% of Americans disapprove of 
the job I'm doing as President! Polls are meaningless!
People are meaningless! I'm all that matters!"
Even More Exciting Than the 
Falklands War
Victoria is Joel Osteen's spouse, and this is her secret.
After Trump Pissed on Lady Liberty's Torch
Good Thing Trump's Machete Isn't
'So-Called President' Lashes Out at 'So-Called Judge'
"Fairest one of all? Ha! I ain't no magic mirror and
you ain't no Snow White!"
Steve Bannon's New Book!

Friday, February 03, 2017

Hello Milo
"Is your tie really green-striped, Sean, or did you spit up
strained spinach on it at lunch?"
Hagadelic Baby, Yeah!
Stephen Miller Uses His Hands to Brace One of the
See-Through Sections of Trump's Wall
One of the penalties of old age is the Eternal Recurrence 
of the Same Old Warmongering Bullshit.
Some say Alternative Hell is worse than 
Hieronymus Bosch's.
"Melania, Melania, let down your hair!"
"Uh, prince, she already has a Chief of Staff."
It's not just that Trumpniks deny reality and live in an 
alternative universe.  It's that that universe is such a 
culturally-impoverished wasteland.
Steve Bannon's favorite channel on Sirius/XM is Lithium
 Grunge (music curated by Vladimir Putin 24/7).
It used to be that only Trump's pants were on fire.  
Now the entire Oval Office is on fire.
"Shall we make it easier for the mentally ill to buy guns 
and for mining companies to dump coal ash into the water
"Yes we shall."
Little Known Alternative Fact #2
Kellyanne Conway Turns Spotlight on Infamous
Bowling Green Massacre
Researchers say third-hand smoke from Trump-Putin 
shotgunning may harm infants.
Like Dubya, Trump has a head-rub fetish.

Thursday, February 02, 2017

We Live in Pendulous Times
Kalanick forgot that his customer base lives in
cities, and the cities didn't vote for Trump.
We Lost It at the Movies
Ghastly Monsters and Blond Giants #187
Rich Cromwell and Mollie Hemingway
Hey, Trumps, let the Prayer Circle be unbroken!
What Jesus Thought of the
National Prayer Breakfast
Like FDR, Trump has a Brain Trust,
except it has a see-through section.
Dress Like It's 1984!
[Head Sold Separately]
World's Worst Yoobs #179
Carrie Lukas
If Case You Need a Sensory Cue for What a Trumpnik
Looks Like
There Can Never Be Too Much Dough
Trump Taps Punxsutawney Phil to Be His Adviser on the 
Climate Change Hoax
Not just Trump is praying for The Apprentice.
“We litigated this [Trump's tax returns] all through the 
election," said Kellyanne.  No we didn't, because
'litigate' means 'to carry on a lawsuit' and all we 
wanted was to see them.
"The Left is absolutely terrified of obscene gestures and 
will do literally anything to silence my finger."
Spiceratops Sez: "I think the contributions of Frederick
 Douglass will become more and more."

"Of course I'm barking mad!  Why else would Der 
Trumpenführer pick me to be his National Security