Saturday, April 04, 2015

Death Threats Traced to Local Man Who Says He Hates 
ALL Bakers:  Christian, Muslim, Straight or Gay
"OK, God, I've connected all the dots.  Now what?"
Flawed Bush, Farcical Rubio, Wary Perry, 
Unimaginable Graham, Bad Deal Cruz?
Such apt nicknames!
James Madison's Second Amendment
  "A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security 
of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear
 Arms, shall not be infringed."

Sam Brownback's Second Amendment 
"Responsible gun ownership, being necessary for 
protection and sport, the right of the people to
 keep and bear arms shall not be infringed."
Smiler Grogan

Unsmiler Pence
Memories Pizza in Walkerton, Indiana,
Plays Who Wants to Be a Bigot 
Millionaire?---and WINS!
Check out those kneeling pads!  When it comes to praying
in public, Ted Cruz & Co. are real pros.
"I would ask for us to pray for peace, but I know for a 
couple of you, that would be a violation of your religious 
Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #622
Paul Shepherd
Every time Tammy Bruce goes on Fox News to defend 
Christianity, Jesus cries out again, "My God, my God, 
why have you forsaken me?"

Friday, April 03, 2015

To wingnuts, Obama is worse than Hitler because 
he's like Hitler appeasing Hitler.
Kansans Allow Permit-Free Carrying of Concealed
Guns, Rename State
Tony the Tiger Sez:  "They're Grrrrreat!" 
"Louie Gohmert says 'Bomb it!'  He thinks it's a centrifuge."
Those Muslim bakers didn't refuse to bake a wedding cake 
for Steven Crowder because he said he was gay.  It's
 because they didn't believe anyone gay would marry him.
"OK, so the Second Amendment walks into a bar. 
 Then what?"
Little Known Fact #59
For authenticity, the Tear Print autographed 
by Glenn Beck is rivaled only by the

Weeping Statue of Padre Pio.
Jesus Gets a Big Surprise at The Last Supper
"Any nuke deal with Iran goes through Congress like
crap through a goose."
"Fellow Kansans, if you can figure out how to conceal your 
Winchester, you can now carry it without any training
or a permit."
According to Ann Coulter and Bill O'Reilly, the 77% of 
adult Americans who identify as 'Christians' are almost 
100% cowards who would rather risk getting Ebola than 
being called racists or homophobes.
Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #621
Curt Smith
"It was the right thing to remove Saddam Hussein from power, 
because he thumbed his nose at me and that sort of rude
 gesture simply cannot be tolerated."
DHS Raises Trojan Easter Bunny Threat Level to 'High'
"Look alive, Buddy!  It's Good Friday!"

Thursday, April 02, 2015

Tail-Gunner Ted Returns from Backlashing the 
Fortune 500 Corporate Backlash Against Indiana's
 'Religious Freedom' Law
"I wouldn't have believed that I would be involved in as
 much as I am today. And it certainly isn't by choice. It's 
just that my hair is on fire."
Texas Trooper Required to Get Counseling for Posing With,
Not Shooting, Black Man
Sorry, Ted, but pigs will learn to fly before you do.
"Is the clam chowder fresh?"
"It sure is.  It's downright impudent!"
For some reason, Pence Cakes are quite popular these days.
Senator Inhofe Offers Proof That Frost-Free Fridges
Are a Hoax
“In Iran they hang you for the crime of being gay.  Heck, 
in Yell County where I'm from, we used to hang people 
for the crime of being black."
“By the end of the week, I think Indiana will be in the right 
place, which is to say, nestled between Illinois and Ohio."
Wingnuts hate it when they are quoted verbatim.  They
 hate it even more when they 'quote' themselves in 
front of a camera.
Brian Bosma, Indiana House Speaker, Working
Diligently to 'Clarify' His Bigotry
Monthly dues for The First Church of Cannabis, Indiana's
newest religious denomination, is $4.20, which, at the
current exchange rate, is equal to 284 Pence.

Wednesday, April 01, 2015

"Fill-er-up, Ma!"
"Mildred and I just wanted to tell you how much we
appreciated the way you politicized the Germanwings
airline disaster.  It simply wasn't tragic enough until
you spoke out."
Stuart Spitzer says that sexual abstinence
works, and, as proof, he cites the fact that 
he didn't have sex until he completed his 
doctorate in Abstinence Education when 
he was 29.
Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #620
Eric Miller
"Honestly, do I look corrupt to you?"
"Not until you said 'honestly'."
McDonald's Chicken Before Removal of Additives

McDonald's Chicken After Removal
of Additives
"In my commencement speech at the 
University of Houston, I will tell the
graduates to become movie stars
and clip their alma mater for
$135,000 in speaking fees."
Warm Scuzzies #545
University of Houston
If you are a gay couple living in Walkerton, Indiana,
please be advised that the Amazon Dash Button for 
Memories Pizza does not work.
The Great Stone Head of San Lorenzo

The Great Stone Head of Indiana