Saturday, October 31, 2009

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #104
Kimberly Daniels
Irrational Halloween Occultism Threatening to
Replace Rational Christian Customs Like Devotion
to Saints and Praying for the Dead
If Halloween is absolutely anti-Christian,
why is Cardinal Francis George wearing
this scary Torquemada costume today?
Papal Bear Takes a Bite Out of Halloween
Is Liz Cheney's nose growing, or does it
just look bigger from a different angle?
Warm Scuzzies #32
Ahmed Wali Karzai
If this old clown shows up on your doorstep tonight,
ask him if he owns or rents his Kentucky trailer house.
Bad Spellers of the World, UNTIE! #49
World's Worst Yoobs #57
Andrea Tantaros
Rightbloggers and Other
Internet Biohazards #18

American Digest
V-22 Ospreys Deployed to Afghanistan;
Taliban Reportedly Terrified at the
Mere Sight of These Widowmakers
Vatican Luring Anglicans

Friday, October 30, 2009

World's Largest Cruise Ship, Oasis of the Seas,
Declares Statehood, Will Soon Become the 193rd
Member of the United Nations
Some Suggest Liz Cheney Suggested 'Obama Honored
Fallen Soldiers for the Publicity' for the Publicity
"Don't talk to me about your 'pill burden'!"
Erick Erickson? Or a pile of fake dog poop,
the best gag gift ever made in Taiwan?

You be the judge.

Warm Scuzzies #31
Mark A. Ciavarella
Yesterday's Tea Party 'Flash-in-the-Pan' Mob
on Capitol Hill raises the question, 'Are ten
people a mob, a mobette, or a mobito'?
"Looks like Senator Lieberman is about to cry."
"Yeah, he just heard someone say, 'Rachel Maddow'."
"You were right. Our Golden Boy doesn't
have a brain in his head!"
Bad Spellers of the World, UNTIE! #48
Wear the Genuine Glenn Beck Halloween Mask,
Make Your Neighbors Weep
[Click on Image for Life Size]
"I'm forever blowing bubbles,
Pretty bubbles in the air."

Thursday, October 29, 2009

Star Parker was born in 1956, too late to
be a member of the cast of Tod Browning's
Freaks (1932). She would have fit right in.
DeMintia Praecox is a cruel disease. Its prevalence in
the state of South Carolina is one of the strongest
arguments infidels are now making to prove that
sanity does not exist.
In India, they're called 'Dog Flowers'.
Makes sense.
In the United States, they're called 'Snapdragons'.
Makes no sense.
Yielding to increasing pressure to comply with truth
in advertising laws, The Politico has now officially
changed its name to

The Republicano.
In light of the unending carnage in Iraq, Pakistan, and
Afghanistan, why is our nation's 67th Secretary of State
Since there is no one-to-one correspondence
between the Arabic and English alphabets, more
than thirty different ways to spell this man's name
now exist. This certainly improves the odds for
those inclined to be bad spellers.
For God's sake, don't be so inhumane as to name
your pet chihuahua Jean-Paul Sartre!
If you're a member of the new--and first--Sam's Club in
China, you can buy fresh, whole crocodiles for a unique
gastronomic experience. Those in the know say crocs
go great with pumpkin this time of year.
First, the Bad News: a 66-year-old South Carolina
Republican deputy assistant attorney general was
caught with an 18-year-old stripper, sex toys, and
Viagra in an SUV parked in a graveyard.

Second, the Good News: the stripper was still alive.
Orly Taitz vs. Bill O'Reilly, Newt Gingrich vs. Sarah
Palin, Glenn Beck vs. Lindsey Graham, David Frum
vs. Rush Limbaugh, Charles Johnson vs. Robert
Stacy McCain, Tea Party Patriots vs. Tea Party
Express, John Stossel vs. Lou Dobbs, GOP vs.
Teabaggers, etc. Like Bill 'Candide' Kristol says,
"It's a good time to be a conservative."
This Halloween, don't forget the finger
foods for the kids.
Nobody expects the Port Wine Brotherhood!
Beware of Dog!
(You Have Been Warned)
World's Worst Yobs #139
Daniel Henninger
Bad Spellers of the World, UNTIE! #47
Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #103
Chris Collins
World's Worst Jobs #102
Grizzly Bear Manicurist

Adventures in Lexicology #14
Backpfeifengesicht (băkfī'fəngĕzēsht) n. a face badly in
need of a fist. [When you look at Joe Lieberman's rubbery
mug, only one word does it justice: Backpfeifengesicht.]

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Hard to believe, but these guys obviously have never
heard that Dial takes the worry out of being close.
"Remind me again, Bogomir. Are we Ultranationalists,
Supernationalists, Hypernationalists, Maxinationalists,
Radical Nationalists, Extreme Nationalists, or just plain
ol' Nationalists?"
World's Worst Yoobs #56
Jeannie D'Ambra DeAngelis
Is General McChrystal about to get a
grip on the Afghanistan situation?
If Kathryn Jean Lopez Were a Cheeseburger

If it fails to enact good health care reform legislation,
the Democratic Party deserves to have its mascot
symbol changed from the donkey to the dodo.
Krauthammerhead Shark
"Yes sir, Mr. Vice President, we always get great service
when we pull this baby in to a Sonic for cheeseburgers
and tater tots."