Saturday, December 07, 2019

Trump Complains It Takes 10-15 Flushes to Get Rid of the 
Lightbulbs Which Make Him Look Orange
The Emperor's New Tat
If you hear someone exclaim, "Melania Trump is 
such a caution!" the speaker is using the word, 
'caution', in its slang sense.  Anything that staggers
 you or excites alarm is said to be a 'caution'. 
In this version of the legend, the Joker is the hero.
Know Your Corvidae
Sign of the Times #81
Not to Be Confused with Speed Humps
Whereas Don Quixote tilted at windmills,
Donald Trump tilts at toilets.
Q: "How many Trumps does it take to screw 
in an incandescent lightbulb?"
A: "One, when he's not out haranguing about 
'Low-Flow Toilets'.  Two, when he is."

Friday, December 06, 2019

Beware of Imitations
Accept No Substitutes
Nikki Haley Takes Aim At the College Freshman Demographic
Medieval Tonsorial Humor
"It's like a religious epiphany," she said rapturously.
On the Campaign Trail with Andrew Yang
Alex Jones Springs a Leak
Lawyers Now Using The Big Book of Conspiracies in 
Cases Where Trumpniks Opt for the Insanity Defense
Deadlier Than the Japanese Surprise Attack
 on Pearl Harbor
Translated into English, Ukraine means
Come to think of it, when the light is just right,
Devin Nunes even looks Ukrainian.

Thursday, December 05, 2019

How to Hug Yourself in One Easy Step
Doughy Pantload at 35,000 Feet
World's Worst Yobs #418
James Rosen
'Devin Nunes' Added to List of Synonyms 
for 'Sycophant'
At 86, Willie has quit smoking weed. At 90, he says 
he plans to take a vow of chastity and give up sex.
Kim Jong-Un Says Trump Suffering Dotard Relapse
"And up through the ground came a bubbling crude.
Oil that is, black gold, Texas tea."
Is Trump in danger of drowning in the shallow end
 of the Deep State?

Wednesday, December 04, 2019

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #786
Ben Cline
“I really don't know if we're meatsacks. 
You’d have to ask Rudy."
GOP Releases Impeachment Report

Tuesday, December 03, 2019

John Kennedy Trying to Decide Whether to Walk Back 
His Retraction of His DNC-Ukraine Conspiracy Theory
When Somebody Picked an Orange Out of 
Trump's Refrigerator and He Didn't Like It

Monday, December 02, 2019

John Kennedy (R-LA) shows that look you get when you
become a Russian dupe.
Lest we forget, Duncan Hunter had been charged 
with "misusing $250,000 in campaign donations, which
 he had spent on vacations, restaurants, and even flights 
for his pet rabbit." 
Adventures in Aestheticism #231
Apostrophe Man Joins the Ranks of the Homeless
Adventures in Aestheticism #230
Apostrophe Protection Society Goes Dark, 
Furloughs Apostrophe Man

Sunday, December 01, 2019

Adventures in Aestheticism #229
"You're pretty wound up, Congressman Collins."
Doug Collins
Tom Collins
Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #785
Doug Collins
Mick Mulvaney with the Delegates to the 8th Bolshevik
Party Conference in 1919