Saturday, April 28, 2012

Don Surber finally hangs up his blogging
 cleats and shuffles off to the Don Blanken-
ship Memorial Old Folks' Home. 
"If Mitt Romney had been elected in 2008,
I'd still be alive.  And I gotta tell you, 
watching Obama spike the ball really
hurts my post-mortem feelings!"
It had taken Jesus only three days to 
arise from the grave.  For Breitbart,
it has taken 69 days---and counting.

According to a new rule, anytime a Secret Service 
agent goes on a date with the President, there must
 be at least one chaperone present at all times.
What James Madison Had in Mind When 
He Wrote the Second Amendment
Little Known Fact #29
One of Tucker Carlson's middle names is
 Swanson.  Yes, that Swanson.
Misanthropes hate people.  Misanthropists do them one
 better:  they also hate misanthropes.
The news of Ayn Rand's 'atheism' had left Congressman 
Ryan shaken, but not stirred.
Big Bigots, Little Bigots #10
Delmon Young
Uh-oh.  Looks like Governor LePage is full again.
Get ready for more bullshit.
Brooklyn School Bans Hugs;
Cookies Still OK
It was bound to happen:  Callista has dumped Newt for her 
Warm Scuzzies #288
John Kuzmich

Friday, April 27, 2012

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #383
Steve Cookson

"I promise you, the President has a big stick. I promise you.”

"Sustainable farming is not a myth."
"You don't say!"
"Yep!  Pass the word."
"That darn Fourth Amendment!  It's getting in the way 
of my scheme to expand Florida's drug-testing industry." 

Thursday, April 26, 2012

Former disciples of Ayn Rand wear penitential hoods to 
keep their identities secret.  But a reliable source
 tells us the guy in the upper-right-hand corner of this
photograph is Congressman Paul Ryan.

White House Gives Terminator OK to Assassinate 
Sarah Connor at Will
Rightbloggers and Other 
Internet Biohazards #121
Save White People

If the Sign of Truth had been a snake, it would have
bitten Representative Todd Akin (R-MO).

When he ran for President in 2012, Mr. Potato Head 
put on a different face to suit every voter.
When The Matrix series ended, Agents of the System 
went to work for the United States Secret Service.
"I'm suffering from 'Food Insecurity', Seymour.
 In other words, FEED ME!!!"
When Rip Van Newticle awoke, the 
Republican primaries were over and 
he was $4.3 million in debt.
Testicle Face I

Testicle Face II
Steve Doocy Demonstrating His 'Paraphrase' of
Standard Teabagging Technique
Warm Scuzzies #287
Spirit Airlines

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Is Mitt comfortable that Jimmy Carter would be 
comfortable with a Romney presidency?
Burger King Breakfast Club, 2017
Will Marco Rubio be this election's Sarah Palin?
New Study:  "64% of Tweets Are Totally Boring 
and the Other 36% Are Completely Unnecessary"

Rick Santorum was on the verge of 
endorsing Mitt Romney, but he
suddenly had to pinch one off and
lost his train of thought.
Karl Rove Doing His Mallard Fillmore Impression
Environmentalists Fear New Biotech Corn
Senator Grassley Sez:  "Those Colombian prostitutes 
could have been a sleeper cell of spies left over from
the Soviet Union."
Secret Service Secret

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Warm Scuzzies #286
Accretive Health

The Defense Industry is shifting campaign dollars, 
which originated as taxpayer dollars, to Republicans.  
In other words, if you are a Democrat, you are being
taxed to support Republican political campaigns.
She said she liked to wear the Confederate battle flag
 because the diagonal stripes made her ass look like 
the CSS Chattahoochee.

Steve Doocy has a new book.

The Politico Illustrated #25
'Senate Dems carry Obama's water'
Hugo Chavez Sez:  "I'm not dead.  I'm getting better.  
I feel happy, I feel happy!"
The House That Insomnia Built

Monday, April 23, 2012

Remember Matt Drudge?  He wore interesting
hats, but he wasn't big-boned.
"If you think my eyes look deadly, you should see my
entire face.  I'm a disciple of Medusa."

Mike Tindall isn't as dumb as he
looks.  He now enjoys 'Royal
Nookie'.  You probably don't.
Not many people do.
Does anyone know who stole this mink's coat?