Saturday, May 07, 2011

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #302
Matt Dean
Warm Scuzzies #183
Patrick Larrison
"If you think this is a strange outfit, you should have seen
what I wore while I was Obama's bondservant in China."
She suspected something sinister, when the President said,
"You do not want to be between Michelle and a tamale."
Flag Desecration #44
A new study suggests that if you drink coffee, have sex,
and blow your nose--all at the same time--you are more
likely to have a stroke.
The baboon was awed by the new
laws requiring Floridians to pull up
their pants and stop having sex
with animals.
Oxymorons for Our Time #100
Republican Presidential Debate

Friday, May 06, 2011

You would never know that these juicy Florida oranges were
grown on trees fertilized by human waste pumped from
100,000 septic tanks.  So fresh, when you squeeze them,
you can almost hear the flush.
Warm Scuzzies #182
Gavriel Bidany
Portable Sidewalk Sign Advertising
Blue Moon Belgian White Ale
"President Obama's refusal to capture Osama bin
Laden so that I could justify torturing him will go
down in history as one of our greatest national
security failures."
Rightbloggers and Other
Internet Biohazards #94
Doug Ross
"The oil speculators would stop speculating up and they would
speculate down until we get our own oil out of the ground.
Amen, Brother Ben,
Shot the rooster, killed the hen,
The hen died, the rooster cried,
And the monkey commited suicide."
John Bolton to Run for President on the 'Happy Meal' Ticket
Audiences agree:  they would rather be waterboarded than
listen to Governor Tea-Paw Bridgefail.

Thursday, May 05, 2011

Even Rummy laughed when he heard that
the Indy 500 had dumped Trump.
Hasmet Hichster Londono Thought to Have Inside Track to
Play Lead Role in Kathryn Bigelow's Kill Bin Laden

"A new poll shows that 58 percent of registered voters in
the United States 'would never vote' for Donald Trump
in the 2012 Presidential Election."
Mike Pence's playbook for winning the Indiana governorship
is lavishly illustrated and so simple even a child can read it.
"Mr. Breitbart, you have been described as a 'Festering
Pustule on Humanity'.  Would you attribute this to heredity
or environment?"
Number of ‘Birthers’ Plummets, Jerome Corsi
Placed on Suicide Watch
Ghastly Monsters and Blond Giants #112
Frank Gaffney and Brian Rooney
Reuters Publishes Grisly Photos of Osama Raid; Not
Pussy-Footing Around, Sarah Palin Laps Them Up
Associated Press and Reuters Decline to Cover First GOP
Debate; "Ron Paul Just Too Goofy Looking," They Say

Wednesday, May 04, 2011

Fearguth's Hall of Wackos #301
Al Pscholka
Beware of Lynx Promising Photos of Dead bin Laden
"Nah, nothin' special.  We're just out here listenin' to
Glenn Beck and makin' fools of ourselves."
Princess Beatrice of Yuk-Yuk Using Old
School GPS to Track Unwary Suitors
Have you heard?  Osama bin Laden's punishment
in Hell will be to stand in an airport security line
for all eternity.
Republicans Lobbying to Add Competitive Waterboarding
 to 2012 London Olympics

Tuesday, May 03, 2011

Warm Scuzzies #181
Douglas Bruce
Mitch Daniels, the GOP's Secret Weapon
Unless you have a lot of time on your hands, never ask
Orly Taitz to show you her papers.
In the market for a luxury yacht?  If so, buy it in Texas and
you will only have to pay sales tax on the first $250,000 of
the selling price.  Not bad if, say, you're purchasing a 50-ft.
yacht for $2,000,000.  Tax cuts for the rich:  that's the
Texas Way.
Anna Wintour Undergoing Mitosis
If you believe that the price of gasoline is determined by
the 'Invisible Hand', you may also believe that God got
so tired after creating the world in six days that He had
 to take Saturday off as a day of rest.
"I was blind to how arrogant and self-centered that I had
become. I did not recognize that I thought mostly of myself. 
So here I am today, giving my last Senate speech, talking
about how contrite I am."
Grandma Teabag was not thrilled that Osama bin Laden
had allowed himself to be killed by the Kenyan Usurper.

Monday, May 02, 2011

Two-Minute Haters #19
Bill Keller

Trump·er·y  (trmp-r) n. 1. Showy but worthless finery;
bric-a-brac.  2. Nonsense; rubbish.  3. Deception; trickery;
fraud.  [A Red Fox hairpiece was Donald's signature bit
of trumpery.]
Coming Soon to a Theatre Near You #54
Show Me Osama's Body!  The Rise of the Deathers
It's official:  Donald Trump is now oranger
than John Boehner.
Governor Brewer Teaching Young Lady How to Play
Pop That Zit!
John Bachmann

Michele Travolta