"Judging by your neck brace, Secretary Gates, it would 

appear that President Obama is still micromanaging you."

Ghastly Monsters and Blond Giants #46

Katie Couric and Michaele Salahi

Sarah Palin says the presidency is "not on my radar
screen." When asked what a 'radar screen' was, she

refused to answer, accusing the reporter of asking

a 'gotcha question'.

"Fortunately, Ms. Couric, we were able to resolve

our connectivity issues without having to call in the

Geek Squad."

An admirer of Futzie Nutzle has been identified as the
'dirty trickster' responsible for substituting The Ultimate
George W. Bushisms for the briefing book Sarah Palin
 used to prepare for her interview with Katie Couric.

"Which face will you be wearing in today's interview, Senator:

the Populist Reformer Face, the Heroic POW Face, the Feisty

Maverick Face, or the Lying Sack of Shit Face?"

Katie Couric Conducts Interview with Sarah Palin's Empty Suit,

Says It Gave Smarter Answers Than the VP Nominee

Sarah Palin will be departing shortly on a motorcycle road trip

in search of answers she has promised to find for Katie Couric.

When Ann Curry moaned as she opened her mouth

for a deep kiss from Katie Couric, Matt Lauer closed

his eyes and waited for the first trilateral conjugation

on the Today Show.

The University of Oklahoma has paid Katie Couric

$110,000 to deliver a commencement address. It's hard

to say which was more ridiculous: the fact that the

university made her such an offer or the fact that

she accepted it.

Katie Couric Leaves Today,

Heads for Tomorrow

After she puts on the mantle once worn

by Walter Cronkite when he was the anchor

of CBS Evening News, Katie Couric will simply

have to lighten up. As anyone knows who has

watched her on The Today Show, her persona

tends to be much too pensive and saturnine.

Katie Couric is reputed to be an even

better dancer than she is a newsreader.

When she becomes the anchor of CBS Evening News,

Katie Couric plans to use Elmo to report all the

good news from Iraq.